The Third test starts tonight so here’s another open cricket thread. As usual, any comments on the play, coverage or sex lives of cricketers (and sexual fantasies about commentators) welcomed.
75 Responses to “The Ashes III”
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Beer, Naomi beer. After a few beers everything sounds good even Homer’s infamous music collection.
Which reminds me it is almost time to head to the pub to meet my Pommy mate.
Let me just note that the apparent advent of English competitiveness in test cricket during this series disgusts Australians everywhere.
Shooper shtuff.
Disagree, Guy - a bit of competition makes it much more interesting. The last test was compelling.
So McGrath is playing? A few days ago he said he was a 5% chance. What a foxer!
Sorry Charlie, toast for dinner and bed at 6pm. Mummy has some important stuff to do called watching the cricket.
“Beer, Naomi beer. After a few beers everything sounds good even Homer‚Äôs infamous music collection.”
I refuted this proposition last night at my local, which was inflicting Australian Idol on the clientele. Even if I had imbibed a 1.5 litre bottle of overproof rum (and remained conscious) I doubt that I could have enjoyed the sound and sight of successive trios of hopeless hopefuls finding new ways to murder “Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?”.
Lou red, hound dog Taylor, miles Davis, jeff Beck, the Who, the clash, Traffic, Mackenzie theory, Butterfield blues band, duanns allman, allman bros just for starters,
actually it would sound good watching the cricket
You missed Led Zeppelin, Frank Sinatra, James Brown and Six & Out.
Oh, and I’m not commenting on the sex appeal of cricket commentators either. Last time I revealed something about my love life (that being the former presence of Lex’s daughter in it) they went and got a Chevening scholarship and their name in Crikey.
only 2 of the 4
Nepotistic Chevening scholarships to America for people who you’ve fantasised about, eh Luke?
…
[contact me baby. you know you want to. I’m right here waiting for your email.]
Ah, the Ashes. There’s my next three nights sorted. (Four if McGrath doesnt play).
my young boys enjoyed the first half hour.
Freddy appears to be faster than Lee
I have a theory that few people actually watch the cricket. They just follow the results and talk about it. Any supporters of this thesis? Or am I alone in finding this game totally and utterly, wrist-slathingly stupid?
Sometimes even wrist-SLASHINGLY stupid.
CL, when you think about it 11 guys try to humiliate each of the other team in turn. The guy with the bat, OTOH, has the chance to humiliate all 11 of them. Sounds awful and could only have been invented by the English, but somehow it seems to work.
It’s very strategic and involves a lot of skills.
I don’t watch large slabs of it, but it fills in a lot of radio time for me in the summer.
I believe they took President Eisenhower to watch an India vs Pakistan match for an hour. I’ve heard that that very hour was the slowest in the history of test cricket.
C.L., I was watching tonight from 8pm til just before. You can tell by the absence of blog comments what people are doing!
Btw - Warney is the new Advanced Hair Man.
That being the case, there is no reason why Advanced Hair Man #1 should ever work again on sbs!
I have a North African friend who simply cant believe a game, any game, can be played for 5 days. “They dont have anything better to do, these people?”
Me, I love it. Long languid days of cricket. Five of ‘em. In a row, or, even better, with a rest day. Aaaah.
Having said that, im now firmly of the view that Ponting is an unispired and overrated captain.
Probably “wrist slashingly stupid” is an exaggeration. I played the game once and used to enjoy watching it a lot. I understand the excellent philosophical description Brian provides. But somewhere along the line I began disliking the Australian team - very uncharacteristically un-nationalistic of me. To me, a rugby ruck is a thing of beauty, as are faultless phases of play by two 15 man armies in battle array. When I think of cricket nowadays I think of spitting, sledging hooligans wearing cricketers’ bling-bling, hugging each other and spending a lot of time standing around. Still, I want Australia to win - of course.
No problem, C.L., barrack for England.
They’re no better. You did read the last line, I presume.
Yes, C.L., but we on the left are used to choosing the lesser of two evils by now.
CL is a sinful gambler so I am going to being a sinful tipster and tell him to back the poms when they come to OZ later.
Their fast bowlers are faster and more deadly than ours. Our batsmen are aging and are quite vulnerable to quick bowling.
If the poms play frddy purely as a bowler and find another quick and toss that tosser Hoggard they can’t be beaten unless our fast pitches suddenly become spinners wickets.
now that has been known to happen!
Does anyone else suffer from cricket anxiety? That feeling that something exciting is sure to happen as soon as you walk out of the room / go to bed etc, and that possibly the fact that you are watching is why they are playing so crap and the minute you stop watching they will suddenly improve, until you start watching again. Or is it just me?
that is part of the beauty of cricket my dear.
It is why I must watch the highlights with my boys.
It didn’t happen last Sunday though!!
CL,
you are the first grouper have met who is into rugger. I thought league was the compulsory sport you blokes supported.
i want to see your ticket!!
Im with you on this one Mindy. Its an illness, but you’ve taken the first step.
Homer: Rugby is not really class ridden in the country.
CL, I have known a few groupers in my time and they were all leagueys.
They didn’t even aspire to play or watch rugger.
times have changed.
Not really, Homer. I played both codes. The world is different in the North my friend.
Cl,
you will be pleased to know it was my frienship with groupers that led to suspicions about me in my youth when in the ALP.
Mind you they didn’t like me championing the IAC either!
I found playing league more satisfying but I don’t watch it but do sneek a peek at the odd rugger test.
Actually cricket is the sport of mixed classes. Wasn’t the Fench who said you wil never have a revolution in a country where the squire is playing cricket in the same match as the peasants?
Heh, maybe I should give the ancient game another chance.
Interesting that the only native French game is ROYAL Tennis!
Mindy, I know exactly what you mean. Turns out I went to sleep last night at the end of the over before Vaughan’s dismissal.
Let the recriminations begin!
Here’s my squad review, which Ive just forwarded to ACB in a self-important, outraged fashion.
IN: Langer, Warne, Lee, Kaspa, McGrath.
Exemplary. Note that Warne and Lee make my 11 as batsmen. Langer to instruct others on value of wicket.
OUT:
Hayden: Show pony, bloated on own hype. Dropped.
Ponting: Show pony, engorged on own hype. Uninspired, asleep at the helm, lazy captaincy. Sacked, dropped.
Martyn: Showpony. Dropped.
Clarke: Metrosexual show pony. Dropped.
Katich: Boring. Dropped.
Gilchrist: To receive treatment for manic slog addiction. Suspended.
Gillespie: National hero. Love the man,& the mullet. But forgotten how to bowl. Dropped.
Looks like there’ll finally be some play on day 3. I have the reverse problem to Mindy’s - I watched the crap video first and was just about to watch the good one when the Manchester weather finally clears!
Lefty, that’s a bit extreme IMHO. Certainly Gillespie should go. Our other bowlers were going at about 3 runs an over, Katich on 4, but Gillespie on close to 6 and no wickets. McGrath had no wickets but 3 catches put down. Gillespie can block (averages 80 balls per innings I believe, and currently 7 runs off 54) but that’s not enough.
Haydn unfortunately is too old to stand outside the crease, and with a tendency to go forward, facing bowling at 150kph. But then they only have Katich in the squad as a replacement. His last dismissal was being bowled with his bat above his head. Not a good look! Maybe Warne and Lee should open.
England have a genuine allrounder in Flintoff who is worth his place in the side as a batsman and as a bowler quite separately. This gives them 5 bowlers, all in form. We haven’t seen the likes since the West Indies in their prime. The only weakness is the wicketkeeper who is there for his batting, it seems.
Nevertheless if Ponting had batted first in the second test it would be all over red rover by now. Instead of looking at the pitch he looked at the history books and found that the side batting first had lost 12 of the last 13.
So I’d say Kaspa for Gillespie, find a decent Australian opener playing county cricket and hope for the best. Unfortunately, though, Ponting has played the opposition into form and self-belief with his ridiculous decision in the second test, and done the reverse to our guys.
Actually I’d bypass Kaspa for Shaun Tait. Lee’s firepower has been effective this series. Tait is quite quick as well and worth the gamble. Kaspa has given his country great service but we need to start looking to the future or the cricket side will really start to resemble the Wallabies.
Irant, I’d be happy with that. Especially if we lose this one we should look to the future rather than try to apply the sticking plaster to the current outfit.
Sack em all!
No, seriously…. I agree: Gillespie needs a rest, and possibly Hayden. I’d have MacGill in the 11 and I suspect he’d wreak havoc. Lose one batsman, yes, but Warne and Lee together make up that slack on current form. Id also stop Ponting reading tea leaves and play the good old numbers on a winning toss.
The wider problem is Australian hubris. They’ve shown a good English side no respect, eg not even bothering to come up with set plans for particular batsmen. And they are paying the price. They’ve swallowed a lot of their own hype, relying on pre-game PR from McGrath and Warne that they’ll ‘take out batsmen x or y’. That stuff is goof sporting puffery, but it doesnt actually work without a team plan.
It’s something of an indictment of the batsmen that Warne has the highest batting average in this series.
I think you’ll find that Pietersen is doing better. And Trescothick.
Among the Aussies, flutey, I mean.
You’re going down mate, and not to alphabet street neither.
bada bum bum bum another one bites the dust
We deserve to lose.
There. I’ve said it. Your taunts are now meaningless.
What Amanda said.
Part of the problem is that Flintoff and the spinner bloke Giles seem to be particularly effective against left-handers, with which we are well-supplied.
But you should have heard Geoff Lawson rave about Flintoff on the radio. A bowler like he hasn’t seen in ages.
Ok, call me an ass tomorrow, but you heard it here first: Ponting, Clarke and the tail to bring it home for the draw.
PS Pietersen is McGrath’s bunny.
Lost your bet, I’m afraid - Clarke’s out, Warne’s in.
He might not lose it, Mark, he mentioned the tail and Clarke had a very important knock.
This is nail biting stuff. 15 overs, 109 runs needed, 3 wickets left. Im not going to bed til this is over. Ah, I love cricket.
Well Amanda, I won’t bother saying well done either. I’m just off to plug in the defibrulator.
Told ya
I further predict Pietersen to fall into a form slough, under McGrath’s wrathful tutelage.
Australia to hold the ashes.
Now, having shaken chains to earth like dew
to slumber like a Lion…
Nice Byron reference, Never.
HUZZAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Haven’t seen it yet. Went to bed at 10.30 and taped it instead. Was Glenn instrumental in the draw? Has he finally fulfilled (partly) his dream of helping the Aussies to victory, or as close as we were going to get in this test anyway. Thank goodness for the rain.
Pidgeon was a rock. In with Lee at the death.
Hero.
He was Mindy - survived four hostile overs after Ponting got out. Did it well too - farming the strike back to Lee in the final over.
Thats the best innings Ive ever seen Ponting play. Steve Waugh-esque in determination.
And , on reflection, it must be said that England were actually pretty crap not to get 10 wickets in 108 overs on a 4/5 day pitch. Put that together with an outplayed Ostraya nearly nicking the 2nd test and it must be asked: Does England lack the cojones for the big games?
I satyed up till 4 and must now lecture with no functioning intellect whatsoever.
Im betting they dont notice the difference.
Pieterson needs to learn to catch - the dropped catch which would have got Ponting out would have probably ensured an England win.
Pom’s haven’t got McGrath out this series yet. They’ll need to work out a special field for him…
aussies are a classic example of a team on the way down.
This series reminds me of the series in the West Indies wheen we beat them and richie Richardson said it was an ordinary side.
We have little matches to change personnel.
Shaun Tait has hardly bowled. Kasper is simply cannon fodder to Pieterson and freddy.
Whom can replace Hayden, Hawke?
As for the Poms.
Find a fast bowler and replace hoggard and you will win the next two matches big time.
Yes they need to replace Gillespie fast. They would be better of trying out Tait - who can hardly do any worse than Gillespie rather than falling back on Kaspa who’s getting a bit long in the tooth and not all that penetrating.
Hoggard is pretty poor. I think he’s just in there to take the shine off the ball with out wearing out a good bowler. Then Flintoff and Jones can make it reverse swing.
jones can swing the new ball.
If I were the Poms I would give him the new ball , get rid of hoggard and find another quickie and become white west indians.
The Poms will thrash Australia when they play us here!
Ok, here’s the deal.
Out with Katich, Dizzy and the injured Clarke. In with Tait or MacGill (depending on the pitch in the 4th Test), Hodge and Watson.
Watson can bat at 7, bowls sharpish and is the future.
And a bit of decent captaincy wouldn’t hurt either. Brilliant hundred, Punter, but you’ve been an ordinary decison-maker this tour, and that fact can’t be avoided.
Warne is the Aussies’ Man of the Series. Considering the state his life’s in off the field, he’s been nothing short of heroic. He’s practically captaining the bloody side too.
Aw, lay off Ponting
Watson sounds like a plan, I’ve always thought he was pretty good. The real problem is that we are playing worse than usual, regardless of how well the Poms are playing. Dropped catches, missed stumpings, sloppy fielding - they all lose matches and this has been deomnstrated.
However I must say I was very, very dissapointed with the Jones/Matthews attack-dog commentary after the game.
I’m not so sure about Watson. My defition of an all-rounder is that he is one of the best 6 batmen in the country and one of the best four bowlers. Watson is neither and against the Poms I think it would show.
Dean Jones had one good idea the other night. He wants to make more use of the technology and the third umpire. It mattered last night when Martin was given out lbw and within 30 seconds everyone knew that he got an edge onto the pads, hence not out. I think it was Boycott on TV who went off his head and said if the ump can’t see that from 22 yards, he shouldn’t be umpiring.
If Martin had stayed and made another 30 or so, Gillie could have been coming in at 4-230 or so. With the Poms packing it he may have hit a quick 30 instead of stuffing around for 30 balls. As it was the radio commentators were pissing themselves half an hour after tea with Clarke still there. We really could have won.
In the last session the Poms had to take 5 wickets in 42 overs. That’s a strike rate of a wicket every 48 balls. Against mostly tailenders in the 4th innings they should have done it.
I wonder whether the umps pick up inside edges from sight or sound. If from sound then the crowd was so restive that it would have made it very difficult to pick up. And if it was so clear that Martyn wasn’t out then surely the Poms wouldn’t have appealed!
I’m not sure that I like the idea of replays on lbws. It just slows the game down (and goodness knows the over rate is slow enough already) and there were any number of lbw shouts that could have quite easily been give out, but weren’t. In the end we only had 2 go against us (Gillespie’s looked pretty plumb) and frankly I thought there were a few given not out that probably should have been given.
I’m inclined to agree. On the other hand the Poms really deserved to take four or five wickets in the first session, and with a bit of luck could easily have done so. Flintoff’s destruction of Hayden was one of the finest pieces of bowling I’ve seen in a long time (and this series has been full of high quality bowling). Haven’t seen any of the last session apart from the last ten or so overs which were being replayed on Fox when I got home from work. There was a dropped catch, missed runout, a very close lbw and numerous plays and misses in that period. If the cricketing gods had been kinder to them the result could have easliy been different. Harmison’s last over to McGrath/Lee was pretty crap though.
Andrew, I only saw some of the earlier part of the innings on TV. I heard most of the rest on radio. Agree about Haydn. He was lucky to last as long as he did. But cricket can be like that.
On the Martin lbw, I think they usually depend on hearing a nick for an edge and the crowd was certainly too noisy. That’s why Boycott said he should have seen it.
I agree there is a problem with knowing when to use the technology and when not, also slowing the game down. Eventually I guess it will be both reliable and quick. But a lot could be solved within the time it takes the fast bowler to walk back.
“I agree there is a problem with knowing when to use the technology and when not, also slowing the game down.”
Agree. I’d make the additional point that modern video technology has led to the loss of some wisdom in the information. The most glaring case is the non-implementation of the rule on throwing. The original rule was intended to allow the umpires to pull up someone who was flagrantly cheating by pinging the ball in a manner obvious to the naked eye in real time. Modern technology makes it possible to detect not only this sort of thing, but also systemically but unintentionally suspect actions, and elbows involuntarily flexing under the stresses of bowling at extreme pace and/or when fatigued. This has led to a considerable muddying of the waters on what was once a relatively straightforward issue. Combined with the intransigence of the Sri Lankans over Muralitharan, it has led to a situation where the umpires effectively aren’t allowed to umpire.
This may sound uncharacteristically Luddite on my part, but I am increasingly of the opinion that the best approach is to:
(a) let the umpires do the umpiring;
(b) not indulge the Sri Lankan captain whenever he chucks a wobbly over Murali being called (chucking a wobbly metaphorically over chucking a wobbly literally!);
(c) accept that occasional errors of judgement will be inevitable and that this will not be a problem in the long run as the laws of probability mean that most players and teams will, in aggregate, have the bad calls against them balanced by the bad calls in their favour;
(d) accept the rare match-turning wrong tough call (Harmison dismissing Kasprowicz?) as part of the glorious uncertainty of the sport.
Make NO use of technology in umpiring decisions.
One of the great things about cricket is accepting the decision oof the umpire even when it is wrong.
How can technology help in LBW decisions for heaven’s sake!
One cannot do many changes because of the poor programming of the tour.
All the people who could play lack match practice.
It is still a good team however one on the decline whereas England is on the ascent.
They will be the best team for some years to come because their bowling attack is quite good and can get better.
Someone before the series started told me freddy was fast medium.
He is quicker and certainly more dangerous than Lee.
guess the OZ batting lineup in the Ashes in OZ. Ponting & clarke maybe the only survivors!
I know I sacked them all three days ago, but to be fair, reverse swing & footmarks are tougher to handle for left handers. Plus Flintoff is much better against them.
Im loving the English challenge - I agree they are a team on the rise. Give them a year or so and they’ll be world beaters.
At present, though, it shouldnt be forgotten that 3 more runs at Edgbaston and the Ashes would already be retained. My point here is that England is showing a lack of ability to put the aging AU squad away when all but beaten.
Warne (and now Ponting) are reminding me of SWaugh against South Africa circa 99. Single handed refusal to lose. This sort of effort really messes with an opposition’s head. I expect a more competitive effort from Australia at Trent Bridge.]
Peter Roebuck (and his crazy prose) reckons Tait is a good reverse swinger. Me, I like Kaspa. And Macgill. Looking forward to a fresh face for the fourth.
Im loving the stories of Flintoff and the England squad pushing the EPL off the front page. Cricket is back!
For once I agree with Homer. Umpiring decisions are part and parcel of a strategic game. They add to the human aspect of the battle. Switching to bloody hawkeye for LBWs or looking at the snickometer for glances take some of the magic away. If you don’t want to be subject to a dodgy decision, don’t play in the margin of error.
Fantastic series thus far.
Can they keep it up and can I stand it further.
remarkable in that it is gaining more coverage than EPL.
I have even forgotten who played who over the weekend!
Video umpiring is often not conclusive in determining catches close to the ground and Ponting (though I can’t remember the details) was for bypassing them for this series in favour of an honesty approach on the part of the catcher.
I was mainly thinking of the snickometer as showing whether and when the ball touched something, but I’m not sure how reliable that technology is. Sometimes it seems to show quite conclusively that the umpire was wrong.
OTOH I’d have little confidence in ‘hawkeye’.
Paul’s right about chucking.
Chucking in Cricket is a pet hate of mine because it is cheating.
Chuckers are eeither offspinners or fast bowlers.
They get extra kick and cut/spin because they spin but they can’t swing or swerve the ball.
I got into a lot of trouble when I was young and had the temerity to call chuckers in cricket (I was a player not an umpire).
It is an absolute disgrace that the greatest wicket-taker will be a chucker!
I agree with Luke about Warne - he would have been a good captain had it been possible to appoint him given his um, off field life.
Ponting is the captain of the team, but Warne is the leader of it.