I almost gagged on my toast this morning listening to Joe Hockey on AM. First there was the bit about John Howard being the Donald Bradman of the Liberal team (I’m already sick of that word but suspect I’m going to hear it a million times in the next month). Howard’s no doubt been dreaming of the Bradman analogy for the past 30 years and now we’re being asked to endorse that particular streak of his egotism (just as the Cabinet have masochistically caved in to it.)
Then came the real shocker: “Everyone in this building and I suspect across Australia knows that Julia Gillard is sitting back with a handbag full of knives waiting for Kevin Rudd to stumble.”
She couldn’t have a bag full of knives or a briefcase full of knives, could she? No, it has to be the oh-so-subtly demeaning “handbag”. (Don’t forget she’s a woman, a childless one to boot.)
You’ve got to hand it to them – the ruthlessness is astonishing. This is pure fiction, fiction that tries to achieve a couple of things: to suggest that Rudd will stumble in some way that is irretrievable – but given that he’s already easily survived the strip club and Therese Rein’s business interests, there is absolutely no indication that Rudd will “stumble” in the way that Hockey wishes for. And it tries to suggest that Julia Gillard is such an ambitious fool that she can’t wait for the extremely popular ALP leader to fail just so that she can get him out of the way and take power herself. That’s just ludicrous.
Of course, what this piece of nonsense chiefly tries to do is take the real events of the past few days where the real knives were flashed inside the Liberal Cabinet because the current leader really is stumbling - in fact falling – and it tries to project these onto Labor. It’s a classic piece of psychological disavowal. It’s the equivalent of Hockey (and the Cabinet) shouting, “Quick! Look over there!” and while our eyes are distracted, they mug us.
Later: As commenters reminded me, Bradman was out for a duck in his last test innings.
Incredible!
Suz, I think I read somewhere this morning that he may have said something about further “softening” WorkChoices. Is that so?
There’s another report on it out today:
http://www.theage.com.au/news/national/managers-strip-worker-rights/2007/09/12/1189276809758.html
Kim, Hockey and co are in full swing denouncing this survey as being carried out by ex-union officials – that was the gist I got from my morning’s radio listening.
Yep, gotta watch those ex-union statistical methods!
Someone should point out to Joe that at least the ex-union officials can find results that support their argument – as opposed to internal Liberal Party polling data.
Someone should point out to Joe he’s a big girl’s blouse.
I genuinely think that Hockey doesn’t understand why his continuing rhetoric about Gillard is gross. I can’t decide if that makes the ‘handbag’ comment more or less insidious.
Evidence to support this contention – I watched him on Kerri-Anne – you know, where she made him dress up as Shrek a couple of months ago, just after the whole “I’m not as pretty as Julia Gillard” thing – and when he was questioned about that statement, he really did seem genuinely bemused that it had offended people. From the transcript, which sort of captures it but doesn’t quite do justice to just how confused and abashed Hockey really did look on the clip:
Why do they all feel compelled to quote Thatcher?
Classic Karl Rove – take your biggest weakness and turn it on your opponents. It makes no sense of course, but it muddies the waters, gives your base something to hold onto, and turns everybody else off the “partisan political bickering”.
Re the Thatcher quote, refusing to ever admit a mistake has been a cornerstone of US, UK and Oz conservatism ever since. And yet they wonder why Beattie remained popular, and can still walk the streets without a bulletproof vest.
Now, looking past the bizarre handbag analogy for a moment, what do we make of this: â??Everyone.. knows that Julia Gillard is… waiting for Kevin Rudd to stumble.â?? It’s news to me. Why was I the last to know?
Thatcher is a touchstone for them because they all harboured fantasies about snuggling down in her dirty pillows while she stroked their damaged psyches and sang God Save The Queen sotto voce in their ears, just after their nightly “this hurts me more than it hurts you” beating.
Great post Suz. I didn’t hear this interview. The handbag reference is telling enough in itself. Reminds me of that time-honoured metaphoric association between handbags and vaginas – http://www.observer.com/node/37830 – so does Hockey see Julia Gillard as a vagina dentata? (Hi there, JF Beck and associates.) But the other point is just right too. In their panic the Libs are projecting their own dysfunction onto the other side. Of course it is Peter Costello who is chief purveyor of knives to the government.
Heh!
That sounds right.
Crossed with Laura. That was in response to David Rubie.
The way this dope’s brain works, it’s a wonder he didn’t follow up with, “Unfortunately, Julia is the one who wears high heels.”
Seriously though, the Libs can’t seem to run a coherent set of talking points. The ALP is a tight bunch of former “union bosses” who are unified in their intent to destroy the economy, and yet as soon as Kevin makes a misstep (assuming he does) they’ll split?
One message at a time, please.
David posted while I was typing, too. His comment does sound about right. That Thatcher-worshipping pathology is explored really well in The Line of Beauty.
So David you’ve read the Leo Abse biography of Thatcher too?
The Liberal team thingy is reminiscent of the Labor campaign in 1980.
Stuck with an uncharismatic and weak leader, Bill Hayden, the Labor strategists devised the three headed leadership: Hayden, Bob Hawke,who was entering Parliament in that election and Neville Wran, at the height of his popularity as NSW Premier, who had just beome ALP national president.
The voters didn’t buy the strategy. All it did was emphasisie what a dud Hayden was.
The attack by Hockey on Gillard is not just stupid, as it will alienate women, it was tried a few months ago and failed. How desperate do you have to be to recycle a proven failed tactic?
But these clown antics are what we should expect from Hockey. As the conservative commentator Greg Craven said in yesterday’s Financial Review, Joe Hockey is “a television act available for twenty-firsts and pie nights”.
Zoe I had a hard time expunging the traces of that book from my memory. Thanks for bringing it up again.
Any book that dedicates an entire chapter to Thatcher’s potty training can’t be that forgettable, surely?
I really love that my copy has a sticker saying “I’m not lost, I’m free!”.
I haven’t read the Abse biography. I have watched the obsequious obiesance to the Thatcher years with some bemusement though. Her nickname “The Iron Lady” pretty much tells you all you need to know about why she’s worshipped by a particular segment of the thumb sucking community we know as the right of politics.
I hadn’t picked Hockey as one of them, but they must all stick together for one reason or other (or perhaps Hockey isn’t aware of the “not for turning” reference, he doesn’t seem like the sharpest knife in the drawer).
suz
God love you. If Tony Blair was Margaret Thatcher without the handbag, it was only because Julia Gillard stole it and can’t wait to start swinging it.
Howard can do whatever he likes with Workchoices, but it won’t matter a hill of beans. The polls have nothing to do with Workchoices.
I don’t see what the squeal is about.
It is called “politics” and politicians do it. *Yawn*
Zoe
One of La Vanstone’s hand-me-downs perhaps?
Yeah, bored now.
BBB
Well piss off then and pick your toenails or something.
Sheesh.
The day after Anna Bligh took over from Beattie, there was a nearly full-page article in the AGE. Of course with an article of that length it went into some detail. But what did they choose to put into bolded font in the callout box to draw people’s eye to the article? something about her appearance. I forget what it was, as it was the dead-tree version and I’ve thrown it out, but something appearance related anyway.
So it goes on. and on. You think you’re bored, BBB? I feel like yanking my own head off every time a prominent woman’s looks, marital status and childrearing arrangements are scrutinised in an article which is supposed to be about her professional life.
The (female) ABC announcer on the morning program here in Canberra phoned Hockey’s office to ask about that handbag comment, and was basically told by a staffer to get a life.
Poor avuncular Joe reminds me of the slightly strange uncle who turns up at all the family gatherings, gets pissed and throws up in the trifle.
Helen, you’ll get no argument from me on that score. I agree it’s utterly irrelevant rubbish.
BBB
Thought you were bored?
and
It’s back to thumb-sucking.
Sooks.
IDK, the magical win-the-election talking points seem to change with alarming frequency. What happened for instance to poor old ‘aspirational nationalism’? Poor bugger seems to have been put down without ever being given a chance to prove he had what it takes.
Still bored, Laura. You’re not helping, either. And silkworm, this entire thread is a massive sook-in.
BBB
Bradman failed miserably in his last innings – out for zip
Boredcat finds expressions of boredom boring.
I hope when the time is ripe Gillard does give Rudd a quick jab to the aorta with a steak knife and I wish Costello had of had the guts to do that to Howard a year ago.
Bleargh. I can remember in the early nineties when it was impossible to distinguish between an the recruitment pamphlets for accounting firms and the Australian Institute of Sport. I’m sure there we’re some bored and unusually fit looking people wandering around Price Waterhouse wondering why they had all these green pens.
And for Hockey – the genial car salesman just after you say you won’t be signing anything today.
You’re a dope, Shrecky.
Donnie was bowled for a duck in his last Test innings. Better leave the “cricket tragic” analogies to your captain who wants to keep batting even though the drover’s dog has declined to fetch any more balls and like eveyone else, has gone home.
Maybe it should have been knitting needles. not knives.
But wait, that would be a literary allusion to Dickens’ Madame Defarge from Tale of Two Cities, a bit beyond our Philistine Liberal Party. Moreover, it would have also inplied some non-working class bourgoisie was on his way to the guillotine,namely,JWH.
Besides, Madame Defarge is far too strong a female role model.
A female with a handbag – who woulda thought????
Get over it.
suz
I am disappointed by your disdaining collective behaviour, which is necessary for the effective functioning of a team. Back in my day of breaking bread with the Left, we all thought collectives were quite the ticket. Perhaps you would feel more at home at Catallaxy?
Grandads’ act is looking a bit tawdry. Go vaudeville.
Throw to the singing , dancing bear who everybody luvs.
Look, he put ‘shrek’ ears on. Ha, ha.
Look, union boss warning joke……. again,again,again,again,again,again.
Recent brainstorm for media grabs from young libs on work experience at HOx2′s war office, agin enemy.
Handbag full of knives. Ha, ha, ha,ha…….
Critical Workchoices Survey, “full of union officials”. Ha..
Go, Joe Hockey, you must be Labors’ finest weapon.
Angas and EC, thanks for pointing that out – that Bradman was out for a duck in his last Test innings (which prevented him reaching a particular milestone) – that bit of info was floating round the back of my head when i wrote the post but failed to make it to front-brain in time. I’ll add a link inside the post now.
A female with a handbag – who woulda thought????
Not me – never used one in my life.
Female without a handbag – and what percentage of the female population of Australia would you represent? Less than 1%, I suspect.
We all know John Howard can’t bat or bowl, so there goes that analogy.
John Howard, Cricketer Extraordinnaire
11 seconds of comedy gold
Evidence that this is not just a recent phenomenon bought on by age.
I wonder if Shrek is “Joe The Camera Man” ?
Mr. Worthing. I must confess that I feel somewhat bewildered by what you have just told me. To be born, or at any rate bred in a handbag, whether it have handles or not, seems to me to display a contempt for the ordinary decencies of family life which reminds one of the worst excesses of the French revolution, and I presume you know what that unfortunate movement led to?
I’m waiting for Downer or Nelson to reveal they are part of a gaming clan that concentrates on military FPS games. Downer’s tag is S3}{}{\|/13}{}{\|/!
The latest Labor advert seems to think confusion is the way to sum it all up.
I’m sure Julia has a backpack like most other people. I’m sure she also has a bit of ticker, unlike others we could name.
This last week clearly shows that the Libs are really a barmy rabble and the PM a dill.
Fancy Howard admitting that he does not intend to honour the simple contract between himself and his electorate if the polls return him as the Member for Benelong.
Why? Not because of age, ill-health or family obligations, but because he wants to remain Prime Minister just long enough to reach his vainglorious goal of outlasting Ming.
Howard makes a mockery of the election process.
Hockey on handbags was just as asinine.
Do you even know who long Ming was PM, judith?
BBB
Make that ‘how’ long…
BBB
I quite like ‘Who Long Ming’, BBB. It has a certain panache.
Well I must admit I don’t know who Long Ming was, CK. So I can hardly expect judith to.
BBB
BBB, civility isn’t difficult. If you know how long Menzies was PM and Judith is mistaken, you could say something like:
You really don’t need to put a question in such a way as to imply your interlocutor isn’t as brilliant as you.
Oh come on, Kim. It’s just stuff made up off the top of her head. You’ve got your punching bags around here, too. But I suppose you are right that it is better to spell it out: Ming had 18 years at it. It’s utter nonsense to suggest Howard wants to just win this election, intending to resign in the next term, all to achieve an goal that necessarily requires him being PM for another seven years.
BBB
Well, given the most recent formula I’m sure it’s not the furthest thing from his mind.
I mean honestly, if the Crodent manages to pull this off there’s no way he’ll be going anywhere.
Leaving out your seven years nonsense BBB we are left with exactly the situation that this rabble has planned and it is not in the best interests of Australia.
But the other question not considered is about the nature of the left factions.
Doesn’t the left wing of the ALP want to have their preferred person as leader?
Why not knife Rudd as soon as possible? All leaders stumble or make stuff ups .
Do they intend to sit on the backbenchs and be unco-operative within their own party? I’d prefer them to pursue power and promote their agenda.
The united front is fine before the election sure, but Rudd can’t be left to think he has inherited the mandate of heaven.
Just came back on to look at comments.
“who long Ming”? He was a Liberal Party Prime Minister continuously leading a Coalition Government for 15 calendar years plus a total of 23 days combined for 1949 and 1966.
At least that’s what my history books maintain.
Think about it some more.
And yes, I do take note of his brief time as UAP PM but that shouldn’t be counted if looking for a ‘record’, due to gap and difference in political party.
pwned
Why not knife Rudd as soon as possible?
I’d think that it must be obvious to everyone in the ALP, no matter which faction, that Rudd is very popular and is going to be a major factor in their win (if they win). Unless they were self-destructive idiots, they wouldn’t ‘knife’ him and thus run the risk of losing power. I’d also like to think that they respect democratic ideals and the wishes of the public. [Of course, much further down the track, all bets are off - as with Tony Blair after several years of office.]
Suz
I don’t think Rudd is that popular – I think Gillard would poll well and so would others.
Weariness with Howard is so powerful at present that anyone other than The Bomber or Madmark would also lead in the polls .
Rudd is shallow and I think he will disappoint many soon after the election -
uranium exports , paper mills , AWAs – he has plenty of hurdles to clear and not much run up will be offered to him by the left wing.
Do you really just what to substitute Howard with a clone?
“Rudd is shallow and I think he will disappoint many soon after the election”
Depends on what you expect. I don’t expect them (or him) to deliver everything I would like to see. All I expect is that they will be better than the coalition based on their policies so far.
“Do you really just what to substitute Howard with a clone?”
Well, eve if you accept that he is just a Howard clone (and I don’t) his team is certainly not a clone of the current mob.
“Do they intend to sit on the backbenchs and be unco-operative within their own party? I’d prefer them to pursue power and promote their agenda.”
No. They will do what they have always done (and are NOW doing) in regards to determining policy etc.
“No. They will do what they have always done ( ….etc)
Well in that case the knives will be ready.
Yes, Bradman was out for a duck, but Australia won that game by an Innings and 140+ runs.
Which is exactly where the Bradman analogy breaks down – because come the election, it looks like being Howard gone for a duck and the coalition gone inside 3 overs. OK, maybe four.