An interesting facet of the coming election is who will God anoint as Australia’s Prime Minister. Members of Howard’s God Squad, including the aforementioned Exclusive Brethren and other beacons of rationality and tolerance such as Danny Nalliah will be on their knees praying for divine intervention.
For them, a Howard victory will be one ordained by the good Lord. For example, The Brethren
hold Government in the highest respect as God’s ministers , used by Him to restrain evil and provide conditions for the promotion of the glad tidings.
It all comes from Romans 13:1 in which Paul wrote:
Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except by God’s appointment, and the authorities that exist have been instituted by God
The Brethren, understanding that God does work in mysterious ways (I bet God is on an individual contract - can’t be an AWA), like to buttress their prayer with some good old fashioned secretive, under the tables ads in the papers.
Catch the Fire Ministries would like christians to come to the Great Hall at Parliament House on Monday the 22nd to thank the Lord for recent rainfall. You’d think that with both the Prime Minister and the Leader of the Opposition being professed Christians, both would be invited. Nope, just the current PM. Nalliah doesn’t want the meeting “to be influenced by a political agendal.”
You see, the thanksgiving also includes a prayer that that
those elected will fulfill God’s plan and purpose for our nation’s destiny and the future generations in this Great South Land of the Holy Spirit!
Translated, we want a Prime Minister that will pander to our bigotry and intolerance.
So, Election 2007 will be a chance to test the efficacy of prayer. If Howards wins, it is the will of God. If Rudd wins, Satan has corrupted the political process.
Expect a Liberal attack ad equating Rudd with the Devil sometime soon. They’ve gotta do something if the union scare campaign doesn’t work.
It’s clear God appointed Hitler (the Pope even sent him birthday greetings), but Stalin? Pol Pot? Hussain? Etc?
And from your perspective, if Howard wins it will be because of a great right-wing conspiracy, not because people simply chose to vote for him.
Despite the dubious claims of Afferbeck Lauder many years ago that Ostraylya is Godzone Country, the Exclusive Brethren and Dany Nalliah have got it wrong - again! As any red blooded American could tell them the US is God’s Own Country, from sea to shining sea. Almost from the beginning it was founded as a refuge from those libertine Papist Stuarts.
Oz, in the other hand, was so irreligious, that its first European inhabitants burnt down the firstr church built here within a couple of days. Governor Phillip even went to the trouble of telling Richard Johnson, our first clergyman, that his job was not to convert the convicts, but to keep them subservient to the State.
With his anti-terror laws and other attempts to corrupt our democracy, Howard is clearly of the latter school of thought.
These born agains don’t know who they’re dealing with. They should consult the Kooris. As one wise old Aborigine remarked of JWH recently, “He’s the devil, that fella.”
And I’m going to wear this tinfoil hat so that the evil Labour union bosses don’t brainwash me into ruining the economy.
b-b-b-b-but Danny got direct actual communication with Me that JWH is my appointed shepherd and voting against him is some kind of expression of free will, or something, which is expressly forbidden by My book!
hang on, even I’m confused now.
God is picking defective prophets these days. Either that, or Niallah is a deluded little efwit with delusions of grandeur, who uses his postion to infer that to vote Labor is to defy God. Gods own conduit speaketh:
What a shabby Samuel though. Is this the best that God can do is it? What is he boldy declaring exactly? What action is this the prophet speaketh forth? What will limit the awsome power of the Lord’s spirit to move across the Great South Land of the Holy Spirit? Aah. In order for God to so move, we need to vote Liberal. Some kind of nifty clause innit? He boldly prophesies that voting Liberal will make his prophecy come true. Awesome, as they say at Hillsong. This guy will put John Edward’s Crossing Over show out of business in no time.
But while the inaction of the people has the added benefit of getting Danny out of the uncomfortable position of being a false prophet if Rudd wins, the alusion to the prophet Samuel and his annointing of a king starts to come apart. The centre just does not hold Danny.
For, correct me if Im wrong, but John Howard/Peter Costello dont look much like illiterate shepherd boys with slingshots.
Danny your conduit wires are f&*cked. You havent been listening. Its little Rudd that has slain the Philistine, havent you been reading?. Pour oil over him you imbecile. God has already prophesied quite loudly. In the Galaxy Polls actually. Every week. His cup runneth over at about 10 points ahead of the incumbent. He even had his Bathsheba in New York dude. He gazed upon as she poledanced. And the Lord’s blessings went up by about 3 points that week. Dont you see what the Lord is saying you moron? Its. Kevin. 07.
Well you might be confused, Yahweh. Maybe they’ve got the prayer power, but we’ll see who’s got the numbers come poll day.
So, whatever happened to:
(Biblical precedent for separation of church and state is it not?)
If Rudd wins, will the Brethren and Nalliah still accept the authority of government in quite the same way?
Peter, that caesar rendering quote is often used, esp. in the USA, as a “proof text” for separation of church and state. The only problem with that is that the big JC was pretty clearly not a modern liberal democrat, and the point of the saying was that *everything* belongs to God…
Never fear even if Howard is voted out come election day . Danny Niallah will lay his hands on him and bring him back from the dead even .
He says he has done it before you know .
He`s a modern day Jesus .Follow me and vote how i say and i will lead you to the promissed land .
Do they follow something akin to the Calvinist doctrine?
No. But I think, from memory, Danny was hauled up and prosecuted for racially vilifying Muslims some time ago. And found guilty.
Danny Nalliah runs Catch on Fire ministries. Yes, I know thats not quite right, but I like the sound of it. Its an Assemblies of God affiliated movement. His denomination is fundo pento. Its highly likely that he prays in tongues and makes lots of money.
Then found not guilty by the Victorian Supreme Court Court of Appeal, which was scathing of the Victorian Civil and Administrative Tribunal’s original finding. [link]
The matter was remitted back to the Tribunal and I understand has now been settled through a process of conciliation.
I prefer the bit where Jesus will knock on your door to call for you — rather than doorknock looking for votes. Jesus was not running for Parliament and I think made it pretty clear the end of the world was due 1,990ish years ago.
If he was, I could imagine the NSW Liberal Party (X’tian fundy nutter) bosses running this ad line against him:
(Adapted from Bill Maher’s “New Rules.”)