So I went to the pub instead, drank a couple of relaxing schooners, and drove home.

Bless you, my child. There’s bonus points for every school zone you speed through.

Playin’ with fire there, David. I forgot to mention that on the way home from my school reunion I got pulled over — lights on high beam flashed at close range into the rear-vision mirror (surely this is dangerous and irresponsible from anyone, much less a copper?), then the turning blue and red lights, and finally a bit of siren whoop just to make the point — for what turned out to be nothing more than a random breath test. I think they were just bored. But THEY ARE OUT THERE.

Which is why I had only had two glasses of wine over 5 hours, and blew 0.00. Sorry, DD, I know that’s pathetic.

So I went to the pub instead, drank a couple of relaxing schooners, and drove home.

Bless you, my child. There’s bonus points for every school zone you speed through.

Still better than Saturday - woke up at 4pm, thought OMGBBQ!!1! What happened to my sinuses?!?!? [streaky mirror on mantlepiece knows… empty wallet nods, winks] Where can I sit in this living room strewn with vinyl?!!?! [fuck it. The floor’ll do] Why do I need a scotch to get out the door for a Japanese dinner party?!?!?! [why ask why?] Why did I agree weeks ago to said dinner party with very sweet non-football-loving couple without checking whether it was WESTERN FREAKING DERBY DAY?!?!?!? [now THERE’S a decent question].

Still, go Dockers!!!

So I went to the pub instead, drank a couple of relaxing schooners, and drove home.

NOw that is a truly glam aspiration.
Good luck.

Then again, it might be “drink, now”. I dunno. I like the cuddles and the awww noise.

Plans for the levitating banana economy on a hold this weekend, as I got suckered Tom Sawyer style into demolishing a built in cupboard. Yes, quit yer cryin’ it was an original 80 year old built in cupboard, but it also reeked of 80 years of rat droppings and is of no use for storage. Her indoors pointed to the massive ball of cables that is where the PC lives and points to a magazine with a neat computer, I explain that the idea doesn’t fit in the hole next to the cupboard where the tangled ball is. Her indoors says, oh shame, that looks like a lot of work and you do look tired. I say, that little thing? Sucker grabs his hammer time. Gah what a mess it was underneath where the rats had been living before we moved in. Now the empty space stinks like tung oil and the rancid stench of sanded rat wee is lodged in the back of my neck. Never marry someone smarter than yourself.

Me, I hear horriffic tales of little sweet 4yo girls like mine turning into teen monsters. Worse on Mum, though, I’m told

Abbotsford convent was great: they’ve got glassblowersm cafs, a gallery, even a bar!

Because we have the New Dog, we have been going to dog obedience club every Sunday. Today we had trials, and after a ridiculously easy test we were both shoved up a class. Both dogs are now Silver dogs.

If they get right to the top of the ladder (which I doubt) they can be Diamond Dogs.

Came up smiling this morning, for a beautiful day in Melbs. Took my daughter to the Abbotsford convent, and Collingwood children’s farm.

Said maths teacher, still an inveterate traveller at 70-something, was singing the praises of the Internet, telling me all about her planned trip to Slovenia and how magical it was to be able to research all the fares and accommodation and maps online. ‘But you taught me the first thing I ever learned about computers,’ I said. ‘I would have thought you’d be a blasée old hand with the Internet by now.’
‘What was that?’ she said. ‘That punching-holes-in-cards business?’
‘That was it,’ I said. ‘I never understood a word of it.’
‘Oh, my dear,’ she said, ‘neither did I.’