So, it’s time again to condemn. Here’s an eighteenth open condemnation thread. What’s getting up your goat this month? Which evil political, cultural, social, musical, religious and other phenomena need condemnation? (Or loud denunciation?)
I’m with Dave Bath. I too condemn the ANZAC Day celebrations for leaving out the NZ. And, obviously, that’s not the only gripe our friends across the Tasman have with us.
[Video via Duncan.]
So you can condemn anything you like, except Kiwis.
OK then, I’ll condemn these buggers for being big, spiny and downright ugly.
Yes, they appear to warrant condemnation.
I condemn myself for not getting a flu shot and therefore for being sick.
Is it kosher to condemn my own blog? Its really terrible. [link]
Or is that best posted under “naked self-promotional exercises XIV”?
I condemn the guy on a forum who claimed that motoring was a necessity and cycling and walking a luxury.
I condemn the late 18th French for not settling Tasmania, or NZ. Would have been cool.
I spose there’s always New Caledonia, though I must condemn it for being a fossilised colony, and rather expensive too. Beautiful though, and you can see the graves of many a Paris Communard on the magnificent Isle of Pines.
I’ll condemn KRudd for forgetting Newfoundland’s contribution at Gallipoli.
If I can’t condemn NZ for the same failing, can I strenuously look disapproving instead.
Lefty E, Frogs in Tassie? Oh no.
Imagine Hobart full of Aussie Quebecers. The food might be better I suppose, but the roads would be full of those bloody neurotic Renaults. And we’d all have to learn Frog just to ask where le pissoir is located in le pub.
Sorry, mate but I gotta condemn you.
Off to La Guillotine with ya.
I condemn those who marched Australians off to be slaughtered in Europe for no good reason.
I condemn those who ordered the futile landings at Gallipoli.
I condemn those who pronounce that our freedom today was purchased by our forebears in WWI.
I condemn those who remember the selfless and sacrificial character of the AIF at Gallipoli and forget the racist and violent character of the AIF in Cairo.
I condemn those who glorify war.
I condemn myself for not being able to work out what the thing on the truck behind me and my friend in this photo is:
[link]
It’s just one of those big wheels that they roll telegraph wire around to transport it. I used to be fascinated by the empty ones when I prowled around train lines in my youth in the UK.
I condemn you for not knowing that, and for not playing on railway lines in your youth. I condemn your obvious childhood of privilege.
I also condemn Kiwis and their despicably over-generous manners. I condemn the 5 kgs I have put on taking advantage of that generosity over the last year.
I condemn myself, SG, accordingly, but I do get to condemn you also for your cross-thread condemnations and your Kiwi condemnin’!
I condemn those who say they are taking action on climate change and do nothing. We may lose the north polar ice cap next summer. . .
I also condemn the coal industry stooges at the Australia 20220 summit who succeeded in preventing a moratorium on new coal fired power stations.
I always wondered what that NZ in Anzac stood for. It’s a shame that I had already added a Worst of New Zealand pic to this weekend’s post.
I condemn all left-wing navel-gazing self-condemners, and their solar-power-industry stooges!
I condemn my cat for getting diarrohea and spoiling my whole weekend.
Actually “leaving the NZ out of ANZAC” leaves you with AAC.
Sounds like a crow.
To which kiwis respond “WHaaaaaac off!”
I condemn, unless they were Kiwis, the idiots who came up with the long spun story that Johny boy would get a knighthood, of the garter kind. For a start, Liz would never be so stupid as to give those Republicans, THAT home goal.
Further, i condemn the goose on, The Insiders, who suggested that Rodent did not take up, said title, “on his own call”. Can anyone actually imagine Hyacinth allowing that?
I condemn tectonic drift for failing to produce some really big mountains in Australia, so we’re forced across the Tasman for decent skiing.
I condemn the climate for changing. Damn nuisance, we should nuke it.
I don’t condemn Aussies for ignoring NZ, I merely pity. Think USA/Canada and ask if you like playing the USA role.
I condemn the real estate agents continuing to make my life hell. I condemn the baby boomers owning multiple slices of property, meaning I’m going crazy trying to get on the property “ladder” (aka merry-go-round) and also making such crappy landlords that I’m buying into the idea that I need to get out of the rental market!
PS: I would not eat AAC cookies.
I condemn people who eat cookies, not biscuits.
Speaking of biscuits, I condemn myself for wanting to eat some Honey Jumbles.
I condemn Microsoft for installing IE7 when all I want is updates for Windows XP. Three times I’ve had to uninstall the useless IE7. I also condemn Windows for not letting me download free anti-virus software. I condemn stupid messages telling me this is not a valid Windows file. I condemn myself for wanting to shoot my computer.
I condemn whatever it was I heard on the TV news tonight that apalled me so much that I can’t remember. All I know is, it was pretty terrible.And it wasn’t more bad news from Zimbabwe, which I also condemn,
I condemn Robin Hood for ending so tragically and query whether Marion will come back from the dead.I also condemn Robin Hood for being a pretty inaccurate rendition of the legend except for Guy of Gisborne. But I did love it.
Its ok Paul, next week its being replaced by some doco on Australian parrots.
I for one expect the dialogue will improve as a result.
Lefty E.
I can handle parrots.
I rember what it was now. I condemn the wanky-ness on ABC Arts shows. Is it just my imagination, or has it got worse since Labor got in?
Paul, you can’t condemn anything about Robin Hood. I condemn out of hand your condemnation of the best Robin Hood ever made. Which season are you up to? I recall the whole thing ends very well!
Speaking of wankyness on the ABC, I condemn Geraldine Dogue. Is it just my imagination, or does she get more narcissistic every week?
I condemn ALL of the narcissists on the ABC, and suggest that singling out Geraldine may only serve to feed her narc*****m. Why oh why do we expect so much from the ABC, and why does it constantly short-change us? I condemn the tininess of the list of “favourite commentators” their lazy journalists use.
I condemn the ABC whenever they steal (plagiarise) an idea from the BBC without admitting so.
I condemn their self-satisfaction, smug bastards.
cheerio
I don’t want to condemn my daughter’s mother’s friend, because that’s just too personal and too mean and too over the top and completely a completely unjustified response, but could I raise an eyebrow at her, for being surprised that I already knew about, and had my own recipe for ANZac biscuits.
(I’m a recent immigrant to Australia, from NZ.)
OMG - I managed to write “my daughter’s mother’s friend” in that last comment of mind, which implies some really, really complicated relationships (like the trans-Tasman one, neh?) but what I really meant to write was
my daughter’s friend’s mother
I condemn HP/Compaq or whatever they’re called this week for making motherboards that don’t last forever. I condemn Microsoft for making an operating system that has to be patched up the wazoo before it starts to become functional. I condemn jobs that require the rebuilding of servers on Anzac weekend after they fail.
JahTeh:
“I also condemn Windows for not letting me download free anti-virus software.”
Voila
I condemn you for not knowing about piracy’s answer to computer security. Yarr!
SG,
Maid Marion has just been killed by Guy of Gisborne. You call that a good ending? If there’s another series not yet screened here please d on’t spoil the end for me.
Or am I just too much of a romantic?
Everyone:
I’ll second Dave Rubie’s motion [post 34].
All those in favour say “Aye!”
I condemn dogs who find it necessary to clean their, er, parts, by dragging their hindquarters along the length of the hallway carpet.
Bad dog!
Mercurious @ 38,
Suspect he needs worming.
I do NOT!
Kiwi lady at 9.59am:
Haere mai, Diborah. Uff you hef sum fush & chups your outlook my brighten.
Wilcome to the Land of the Long White Patronisers.
(whom I condemn unreservedly, and I liked the fillum of the Kiwi Resistance!)
Kim:
ANZAC
Is that better?
well, I hate to sound shallow, but that Kiwi barperson can get me the good stuff anytime.
Thank you FDB but I have my registration key for Avast but that’s one that Windows won’t let me have along with Adaware, Microsoft’s own security and ZoneAlarm updates.
I condemn everyone who called Geraldine narcissistic. I worked for her SO, have been to her house, have drunk her wine, pretended to be fascinated with her show. The woman is all Catholic Labor charming. How very dare you. I condemnate you all.
Watch out for mobile proglottids, Mercurious. *shudder*
I have nothing to condemn. Must try harder.
I met Geraldine once, when she interviewed me for her Radio Show. What casey said. I add my condemn to her condemn!
Condemn your blatant bias. Was it nice wine?
Geraldine did a rather bullying interview with Anne Deveson on he subject of resilience where she kept saying “but studies show that religious belief make one more resilient” splutter splutter.
I’m with Fmark.
Oh, oh, oh. I so so condemn your cynicism that I could be bought with nice wine. You should know by now that its illicit druges that Im after, or eastern european absyth. Whats the matter with you?
I put it to you that you that she glows like a candle. And TV is just TV.
yes: druges = drugs
and absyth=absynth
I condemn my stupid keyboard which types slower than me.
She does glow, it is true.
I submit that your egregious spelling errors are a sign that you have more than enough illicit drudges and green flies and gnomes and such in your system already! (she says with a wistful sigh)
If Geraldine will get some more of those docs about archaeological digs in the holy land then I will retract my condemnation unreservedly.
I condemn myself for taking the camera to Melbourne specially and then realising as I walked into Stephanie’s 50th birthday party that I had left it in the hotel room.
I also condemn myself for not being organised enough to meet up with any bloggy mates while I was there.
Oh now I so condemnate you that you know its not my keyboard.
Lucky for me your powers of perception are partial and you dont know its not the green fairy the the best wine that $15.99 can buy thats causing it.
Anyway, apropos of nothing, I condemn my confounded phd which wont come together. The bastard. (gendered masculine as an example of shameless essentialisation).
And one more serious condemn. Im condemning Big Brother Big Time. Im watching that gorgeous Qld export Kyle Sandilands (and I do note that you never seem claim him as one of your own, Mark) and I can hear old Kurtz on his deathbead whispering “The horror, the horror…
I condemn this grotesque display of wealth. Mine was $11.99.
I condemn myself for the use of the word “wittering” in a wholly unworthy comment when the only honourable use of that word, as Helen from CIB already knew, was in the summary smackdown of a clueless Twisty critic.
I condemn myself for not being aware of Kyle’s state of origin, casey.
But I join in your condemnation of Big Brother. I also condemn the housemates for not coming up with the fairest and obvious solution to BB’s snap eviction - draw lots.
And I further condemn the host of Australia’s Favourite Dancer. For obvious reasons. And for “Australia” for not voting for Rhys!
F*cking Sandilands on my TV - a sure cue to switch channels rapidly. No Big Brother for me this year, I condemn it, Sandilands and the donkey he rode in on.
I’d like to condemn the chair sniffing Mr Buswell but it made us laugh so much we couldn’t. Chair sniffing? I can see why people sniff glue, but chairs?
The best that could be said about Mr Sandilands is that he makes co-host Jackie O seem rather more fabulous than perhaps she is. But I don’t know their work, apart from tonight’s BB opener. Should I condemn myself for that?
Back to Robin Hood.
I condemn all the anachronisms (and no, I do not buy the today’s vernacular equals 12th century vernacular line).
I condemn the Sherrif for not recognising the Merry Men every time they threw a scrap of burlap over themselves and snuck into the castle. Masters of disguise, not.
I condemn all the baddies for not recognising that the Nightwatchman had substantial bazoongahs when they engaged in close quarter combat.
I condemn the Sheriff for inventing agonising deaths for Robin, then leaving the room - just like James Bond
I condemn the ABC for getting my hopes up that I was going to see a rollicking good show.
I congratulate the old dear in the UK a few weeks who split an arrow when the mythbusters couldn’t.
Ahh, Good old Vile & Jackie Hoe :-)Johnny Young was a legend for telling him to Get Lost.
[Young: Good morning Kyle.
Sandilands: Good morning Johnny. Nice to hear that voice again.
Young: Nice to hear yours, but we’ve been waiting for you since ten past eight.
The guest gave the excuse of having no signal on his telephone, but Young was having none of it.
Young: I’m sorry but you’re too unprofessional for us and I don’t think we’ll take the time to talk to you… and get lost.]
[link]
Re Sniffwell, Despite all the Argy-Bargy in the ALP re pre-selections, Carpenter will romp in because of the simple fact that Sniffwell is such a creep and will alienate the female vote.
Mark wrote:
Sandilands is basically a nasty piece of work, for which he must be roundly condemned. Jackie O I have no opinion of other than condemning her for continuing to work with Sandilands. I don’t condemn anyone who doesn’t know about Sandilands, as ignorance is bliss in this case.
I did try sniffing my own chair today, to no great effect. What am I doing wrong?
I condemn Paper-Mate HB pencils for having crappy poor quality leads which crumble whenever I try to sharpen them.
Her loveliness will be assimilated as an Aussie actor. The Borg has spoken.
Frank, I don’t think “Jackie-Hoe” is very appropriate.
David R @ 61,
Only Liberals have the olefactory sophistication/decadence to get off on chair-sniffing.
Paul,
I once went to a wine appreciation / cheese appreciation night that was very informative. Perhaps the WA Libs can hold one in chair sniffing so we can get the right technique, know which chairs to sniff and when and whatnot. I’m pretty sure it’ll mesh well with other techniques like boob talking (talking to somebodies boobs rather than their face), shoe-mirror attachment and other kinds of things that used to be fine before political correctness turned us into a bunch of feminist luvvie sissies.
I remember quite fondly an “appropriate workplace behaviour” exam they made us do here - the blokes found quite a few new behaviours that had never occurred to them before and quickly put them to use on the ladies.
In fact, in the spirit of the thread, I condemn the WA Libs for not holding a chair sniffing appreciation evening. I’m off to find a mirror for my shoe.
[Frank, I don’t think “Jackie-Hoe” is very appropriate.]
Mea Culpam I withdraw it and replace it with Jackie Oh
Roger - you do know that if they did try to put much - or any - real Old or Middle English into a show set in the past they’d get no ratings?
Wasn’t Mel Gibson’s weirdo Jesus movie in Aramaic and Latin?
I condemn audiences for not getting subtitles!