An open thread, where at your weekend leisure, you can discuss anything you like.
Life, Culture and Politics from BrisVegas
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Umm Frist?
Happy Proclamation Day!
No rest for the wicked..never thought I’d be trying to earn pennies in my dotage.. but ah well, here we go again.
To follow the “one guitar, four hands” vid, here’s one with seven drumkits, fourteen hands, and some gratuitous weirdness.
I’m just listening to one of my Christmas presents – one of my sons bought me a Seasick Steve CD. It’s excellent!
*takes cue*@4
Trys again….
Blimey, Zorronsky. What is it that it is that you are doing to supplement your daily dotage crust? More importantly, do you enjoy doing it?
Mop and bucket Jane and it’s no hardship, just a little, often.
It’s raining, it’s pouring…. The Cockies are rejoicing … er…
Thanks, joe2!
Unmoderate me!
Unmoderate me!
Right, now I’m free.
Merry Christmas! Now over at the Daggett thread, i’ve been thrown into jail
me.
????
If someone with the keys wanders over, unlock me will ya? But delete a few of of em please. And put in the one with Susan Sarandon in her underwear.
Many thanks.
You’re welcome David Irving (no relation)@10. I was quite taken by Seasick Steve when he appeared on a few shows here during his tour this year.
I also have been listening to a cd given to me by my son. This one by Neil Murray.
He has also been around for many years starting off with the incredible “Warumpi Band”.
I found him singing “Lights of Hay” on YouTube. Just brilliant imho.
Puzzling. In the last few weeks I have encountered a number of parents who have blithely told me that their nine-year-old child can’t swim more than a few strokes. Middle-class Anglos, in Sydney. I put my 8yo into swimming classes when he didn’t quite get it at the school lessons this year, and thought that I was probably a bit dilatory. (School swimming lessons are part of the problem, I think: in my day, they taught you to swim, and took you as far as they could for as long as you were entitled to go. These days, they teach you how not to drown, and once you are somewhat drownproofed, they don’t want to see you any more.) I did remark to one parent that this would start to damamge the child’s social life (pool parties, beach trips) and they acknowledged that this was becoming an issue… but where’s the common sense here?
9. Dee Cee
Wonderful Hanrahan.
…the wet…cracks gorge…soil goes…such is life…
Years ago me and me mates usta get pissed on goons of wine at Camp Cove at night and go swimming. Silly, but I was young. Then, up on the north coast at some secluded beach one foot from the shore, up to my knees, I got caught in a rip and it took two very strong guys to drag me a few feet onto the beach. Scary.
A newly released video “Cutter Charges at Work in the North Tower of the World Trade Center” points out the evidence captured on two different videos of cutter charges destroying a corner 14″ box column of the North Tower. That 14″ column through which focused jets of debris emerged could hardly be construed as a point of “least resistance” as FDB and others have attempted to claim of another focused jet of debris. So, they cannot possibly be explained away even as being caused by air pressure caused by some kind of brilliantly efficient piston action of the collapsing tower.
Apologies. The above post was posted to the wrong Saturday Salon.
It actually doesn’t matter that much Daggler.
Lay your ordure where you will.
Paul Burns, Christmas is probably an appropriate time to recount ones luck involving yuufful silliness and bags of butterflies in the lower abdomen.
Years ago I found myself as a mechanic and driver on safari on the shores of King Island in the Okavago delta. It was a remote bush camp from where we took 20 PAX to show off the abundant native wildlife by foot, vehicle and boat. An amazing spot, as one could expect to come across anything from Tsetse Fly to Elephants. The main channel, of approx 2m depth, was close and petering out to a very shallow beach next to the camp. Contrary to the ‘Salties’ here up north, the Nile Crocodile does inhabit most reasonable size freshwater bodies in Africa. Thus, everyone was under strict instructions not to enter or go near the water, unless the area has been cleared. So, one particular evening, having replaced another bleep-ing half shaft on the series 2a L/R by gas light, I found myself covered in sweat, grease and sand from head to toe. I was looking forward to have a wash and a feed before hitting the sack. However, I found all the washing buckets empty and the boys were off for the night. Also the camp cook would not let me near the food and Pax unless I had a scrub. So there I stood at the beach with my bucket. I figured to fill the bucket I had to wade out a fair bit anyway, so I might as well take the rags of and have a quick dip. The sky only dim lit by the campfires behind the bushes, there I was, 30 meters in, just had a dunk and refilled the bucket, when, what seemed like, an almighty explosion just in front of me in the water. Hell, my feet did not touch the ground, in a flash I was out of that water sans bucket. Then I realised, what I thought was a Croc was just a Hippo surfacing. They tend to surface with a blast, akin whales, after one of their prolonged periods underwater. Nevertheless, Hippos have the reputation of being the most injurious of herbaceous large game. So I stood there shaking and counting my luck. The penny though only really dropped, when almost a year later on the very same spot, a bundle of clothes were discovered while a customer was missing. It appears she went for a dip in the early morning and her body was never found.
Yeah yeah, I know I’m breaking my Christmas blogging hiatus, but it’s a rooly rooly cold rainy night here in Brooklyn (after a lovely holy day and the remnants of a spectacular blizzard! — or what counts as a blizzard in these inferior days, grumble grumble), and also I’m a wee bit toasted, from earlier activities. (Just about an hour and a half ago I overheard the most hilarious randomly overheard Christmas dialog line in years, in a local dive bar, but I think I’ll save it for a couple of days before posting it because it’s too, well, *too*…)
But I did find this earlier today, sort of by chance, and was disappointed at how poorly chosen the selections were. So I thought I’d start a poll here.
Granted I think that strictly on points, the best opening line for a rock n roll song has got to be the Stones as in “Please allow me to introduce myself…” with no questions asked. But it’s just not my personal favorite. Plus, for polls like this you sort of have to exclude the Beatles, Stones and Dylan, just to make for an interesting (but not fair) playing field.
So, LP: with the exception of Beatles, Stones and Dylan, what are your candidates for best opening lines for a rock n roll song?
Rules (but not strict ones): ideally you should limit yourself to a couplet, but if a quatrain is justified then it’s sorta OK (although single lines and couplets are better). Delivery counts, but not for more than say 40%, e.g. Bowie’s “Ziggy played guitar” or the Dolls’ “Something must have happened / Over Manhattan” are both brilliant in their way, but it’s really more delivery than content so it sort of doesn’t count. Also, slogan-like lines like the Ramones’ “Hey, ho! Let’s go!” should be excluded because even though they’re great they aren’t very interesting as selections.
Just to kick-start, here are a few of my own picks…
#1: “I don’t know / Just where I’m going…”
– Lou Reed/Velvets, “Heroin”
#2: “I’m the King of Rock! There is none higher!
Sucka MCs should call me sire!”
– Run-DMC, “King of Rock”
#3: “Honest to goodness, the bars weren’t open this morning.
They musta been voting for a new president, or something.
Do ya have a quarter? I said Yes, because I did.”
– X, “More Fun in the New World”
#4: “I met her by the Burger King,
Fell in love by the soda machine…”
– Ramones, “Oh Oh I Love Her So”
#5: “I don’t mind you coming here,
And wasting all my time…”
– The Cars, “Just What I Needed”
and for cult winners…
“My smile is stuck,
I cannot go back to your Frown-land…”
– Don Van Vliet, “Frownland”
“I’ve got a bike!
You can ride it if you like!”
– Syd Barrett, “Bike”
“Waldo Jeffers had reached his limit.”
– Cale/Velvets, “The Gift”
“Yes indeed, here we are…
At Saint Alphonso’s Pancake Breakfast!”
– Zappa, “Saint Alphonso’s etc etc”
Okay, that’s enough out of me. Have at it, holiday-fatigued bloggers.
Yoiks, moderated — and at Christmastime!
Was it because of quoting The Cars? (After all I could almost see that as justifiable…)
I promise you’ll be entertained rather than hectored…
xo,
Santa Jaws
Oh yeah, two more great ones before I forget (just to inspire you)…
“Look out Mama,
There’s a white boat
Coming up the river…”
– Neil Young, “Powderfinger”
and what is probably my own all-time personal fave (not that it counts more):
“I like the way you cross the street
Cuz you’re…precious.”
– Chrissie Hynde, Greatest Rock n Roll Song Ever Written
OK, I’m Oooold. You barred all my old faves. And I think we do great song intros
We have the chance to turn the pages over
We can write what we wanna write
J Farnham: “You’re the Voice”
Well I heard it on the radio
And I saw it on the television
Back in 1988, all those talking politicians
Yothu Yindi: “Treaty”
Traveling in a fried-out kombi…
on a hippie trail, head full of zombie…
Men at Work: “Down Under”
Who’d like to change the world
Midnight Oil: One Country
And my pick for the most acute opening sentence EVAH!
Jane Austen: Pride and Prejudice
“I don’t believe in an interventionist God …”
- Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds, “Into My Arms”
And just for you, j_p_z …
“We’re all living in Amerika!
Amerika ist wunderbar!”
- Rammstein, “Amerika”
The Zombie book’s equivalent is OK too, DeeCee @26.
Something you should know about Love Shack Lyrics
If you see a faded sign a- the side of the road that says
15 miles to the…Love Shack! Love Shack yeayeah
I’m headin’ down the Atlanta highway, lookin’ for the love getaway
Heading for the love getaway
B-52s, “Love Shack”
You get a shiver in the dark
It’s raining in the park but meantime
South of the river you stop and you hold everything
A band is blowin’ Dixie double four time
You feel alright when you hear that music ring
Dire Straits, “Sultans of Swing”
And if older pop songs count…
Du holde Kunst, in wieviel grauen Stunden,
Wo mich des Lebens wilder Kreis umstrickt,
Hast du mein Herz zu warmer Lieb’ entzünden,
Hast mich in eine beßre Welt entrückt!
Schubert, “An die Musik”
“Tower of Song” by uncle Leonard, of course.
Patti Smith’s version of “Gloria”.
Bo Diddley, “Who do you love”
cool, jpz. btw. Last ones, and cause it’s the silly season, as we say down ‘ere:
TISM, “Whatareya”
Frankie Lymon & the Teenagers, “I’m Not a Juvenile Delinquent”.
“I’m handcuffed to a fence in Mississippi, my girlfriend blows a boozy goodbye kiss.”
Handcuffed to a Fence in Mississippi, Jim White
See the way he walks down the street
Watch the way he shuffles his feet
“He’s a Rebel”…The Crystals
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:He%27s_a_rebel.jpg
Hey!
The crackpot thread is dead. 20 comments out. RIP thread
Man, who can forget that tortoise sex???
(Sorry FDB, I know, I know – about the song, your cat – forgive me)
Can we do books too?
“124 WAS SPITEFUL. Full of baby’s venom”
Toni Morrison, Beloved.
Yeah, Casey, I was hoping it’d crack 2000 comments by the new year. Still, loading it to add yet another smartarse comment was making my web browser struggle, so perhaps it’s just as well.
Moniker also serves as dual on-topic comment.
moderated
“I’m an alligator”
David Bowie – Moonage Daydream
“If you’ve done nothing wrong, you’ve got nothing to fear.
If you’ve something to hide, you shouldn’t even be here.”
Pet Shop Boys – Integral
“Where there’s truth the green valley steals cottonwood
Where there’s peace a little cloud of music gleams brotherhood”
Captain Beefheart – Where There’s Woman
Meant to post this on the crackpot thread, for the ‘staff xmas partee’ last week, but suits the bump-out-partee even more…see youse all on the dancefloor.
Townes Van Zandt, “Waiting Around to Die”
Vale Truth is Out there Edition.
“What if I told you it was done with mirrors
What if I showed you it was all a lie”
Steve Earle – Conspiracy Theory
Lots of great openers here. (I especially like the Jim White and the Bo Diddley — how could I have forgotten that one?)
Queen is always good for a few, notably for aggressive ones such as “You suck my blood like a leech!” and “Get your party gown ‘n get your pigtails down ‘n get your heart beating, baby!”
In the aggressive vein, we also have “NOOOOBODY makes a move!” in Don Van Vliet’s immortal delivery from “Sun Zoom Spark,” and “Git up! and git your granmaw outta heah!” from some early neanderthal KISS song, maybe “Deuce”?
What is the best AC/DC opening line?
I have a special fondness for Greg Lake’s “Benny was the bouncer at the palais de danse!”. When I was a teenager I could play most of that piano solo. Alas, no longer.
Longest opening sentence probably goes to Yes for “The Revealing Science of God” — IIRC, that sentence is like 40 or 50 words long. Second place I bet goes to Syd Barrett for the opening sentence of “Astronomy Domine”.
X are good for a bunch more, including “I’ve seen a lot of people with plenty of guts.” And also this gem:
“The room has emptied out.
It’s time to wash your face
And throw away your food.
Leave your sister home and come with us.”
Most enigmatic goes to Richard Thompson, natch:
“A man is like a rusty wheel
On a rusty cart.”
Dear Editor,
I wish to protest in the strongest possible terms the unwarranted and untimely closure of the Saturday Salon Truth Is Out There thread. We were twenty one (21) comments short of the summit. Is this the spirit that conquered Everest, tunneled through Snowy Mountains and brought Waterworld to the screen? I say no and demand an immediate re-opening of the thread. Rest assured my local member will be hearing about this travesty of justice in immense detail.
Yours,
Less than gruntled of St Kilda.
“who insisted on needlessly bloating the size of their own contributions, and who added trivia against my objections, for no better purpose than to set some new unprecedented record for this web-site and who openly welcomed the opportunity that they saw that it gave them to publicly humiliate me:”
You sound surprised and shocked about this. First time on the internet Daggy?
OK, back off OT. When I comes to great song opening lines, I have two yardsticks. A) is it a bloody good line that stands on its own and/or B), the line, while not standing out out of context, does perfectly set or encapsulate the tone and theme of the song in question. In short, separating the words from the vessel that bears them. Good or bad? Discuss.
So here’s a few of my favourites based on the above criteria.
“With a purple umbrella and a fifty cent hat”
Living, Loving Maid – Led Zep. Instant snapshot of a high style hippie from a wealthy family slumming it. At least I think that’s what the song is about. The rest of the lyrics are pretty wooly. Anyway sounds great delivered by Plant with knotted testicles.
“It’s quarter to three, there’s no one in the place except you and me”
One For My Baby – Johnny Mercer. The only possible opening line for the world’s greatest saloon bar ballad. To hear Sinatra sing it is to hear boozy melancholy at its most sublime.
“Punctured bicycle on a hillside desolate. Will nature make a man of me yet?”
This Charming Man – The Smiths. Not a big Smiths fan but this is a marvelous opening to a great song. You just know the young and self-consciously naive narrator is going to have something life twisting happen to him.
“This is tonight, and it rains like in a French black and white movie of the
Fifties.”
She’s Got A Gun – Yello. That is so so Yello-style ironic romanticism.
“By the time I get to Phoenix, she’ll be rising.”
By The Time I Get To Phoenix – Jimmy Webb. I once got throughly pissed with Mr Webb who told me many of his best lines came to him in dreams and he’d write the rest of the song to find out what they meant. The conjunction of “Phoenix” and “rising” makes me suspect this was one of those lines. Also the present tense of “By the time I get to…” fires up the song’s narrative energy very nicely.
“We’ll be close together, wait and see, Oh by the way, This time the dream’s on me” This Time The Dream’s On Me – Johnny Mercer again. Another artful confluence of booze and lost love.
“In the deserts of Sudan and the gardens of Japan. From Milan to Yucatan, every woman, every man”
Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick – Ian Dury. Around the world in just a few funky bars. Love the tension of “Every woman, every man…” left hanging until it’s detonated by the chorus. Incidentally the new Dury biopic looks good, not least because Andy Serkis looks and sounds exactly like Ian in the trailer.
“I once had a girl, or should I say she once had me.”
Norwegian Wood – Lennon/MacCartney. In only 13 words, Lennon beautifully sets up it’s a missed love song that’s both utterly of its time yet eternal.
“They say the neon lights are bright on Broadway”
On Broadway – Leiber, Stoller, Mann and Weil. The glamorous promise of “neon”, “bright” and “Broadway” subtly undercut by “They say”. The yanks do these clutching for the stars songs so well.
“Je t’aime je t’aime,Oh oui je t’aime
Moi non plus, Oh mon amour, Comme la vague irrésolue
Je vais, je vais et je viens
Entre tes reins, Je vais et je viens
Entre tes reins, Et je me retiens”
Je t’aime moi non plus – Serge Gainsbourg. Old Serge wasn’t holding back then. Mind you, it’s all in the delivery as the actress said to the songwriter. His new biopic also looks good, especially my idea of a songwriter’s lazy Sunday afternoon in the Rive Gauche.
“And did those feet in ancient time, walk upon England’s mountains green?”
Jerusalem – William Blake. Even better when belted out with full choir and organ. I’m a total sucker for opening lines that ask a question and set up a journey. Anyway it’s William Fucking Blake for chrissake! The man never wrote a false line.
And finally, the true rock of ages.
“Like to tell ya about my baby, you know she comes around
She about five feet four, from her head to the ground
You know she comes around here, at just about midnight
She make ya feel so good, Lord, She make ya feel all right”
Gloria – Van Morrison. That mixture of precise detail (“five foot four”) and transcendental lust (“She make ya feel so good, Lord”), dynamic control and ecstatic release is pretty much the essential fixings of any great pop song. Blake, Mercer and the little girls understand.
Motown can wait for another post.
And speaking of Gloria/Van Morrison/Them brings to mind Lester Bangs’ sleeve notes for the London Records Them double album.*
“…We could hardly believe that that short, pudgy replica of the grey nerd who sat behind you during a whole semester of Driver Education and never spoke a word, that that absolute antithesis of every Superstar image ever stamped into our skulls, could be the helmsman of this wild night’s ride.”
And that boys and girls is, I put to you, what this whole rock and roll thing is about. Turning grey into gold.
* While Lester’s Creem stuff was great, I reckon he did his best work writing sleeve notes. Tho labelling Jim Morrison a “Bozo Dionysus” was pretty damn funny.
Nabokov: “…what this whole rock n roll thing is about.”
Kim Gordon once said something rather interesting in this regard.
She said: “People are willing to pay money in order to see other people believe in themselves.”
Nabakov, you never disappoint.
In the same vein as your offering from Van the Man, I give you
Yonder she’s walkin’
She comes my way
Red dress on
Long black hair
from the song that made every red-blooded Australian lad rush out and buy a 12 string guitar.
Let’s face it, when it comes to great pop song opening lines that capture the essential giddiness of the medium, it’s damn hard to beat Awopbopaloobop Alopbamboom.
“People are willing to pay money in order to see other people believe in themselves.”
Oh yes, spot on Kim.
The flipside to that is Lester Bangs (again).
“The ultimate sin of any performer is contempt for the audience.”
“ooh, love to love you Baby..”
“ooh, love to love you Baby..”
(Donna Summer, I think..)
Last year’s election was fought won and lost on the battle ground that was WorkChoices.
Next year’s election is going to be fought on the battle ground of the new “religious right” frontier – ChurchChoices!
http://guttertrash.wordpress.com/2009/12/28/churchchoices/
Divine, “You think you’re a man”
Scott Walker sings Jacques Brel, “My Death”
Loretta Lynn, “Coal Miners Daughter”
While we’re studying lyrics, may I submit my entry for the worst couplet in popular music:
From the theme song for High Noon, “Do Not Forsake Me Oh My Darlin”, which won a best song Oscar (fer cryin’ out loud). Well, it was 1952, somewhere between Johnny Mercer and Lennon/McCartney.
If we’re getting into the whacky now when it comes to starting a song, it’s hard to resist the opening line of Jodie Foster’s most successful flirtation with 70s French pop, “It’s an owl’s life”.
Up there with Colin Moulding’s “We’re only making plans for Nigel”.
Jo,
I was thinking about that Divine song earlier today too..!!
As well as this old favourite from when I was about 18…
Well you didn’t wake up this morning
Because you didn’t go to bed.
You’ve been watching the colour of your eyes turn red.
The calendar on your wall is ticking the days off.
You’ve been reading some old letters –
You smile and think how much you’ve changed.
All the money in the world
Couldn’t buy back those days.
(The The – This is The Day)
“Three Bells”
Tin soldiers and Nixon coming
We’re finally on our own
This summer I hear the drumming
Four dead in Ohio
The summer of love couldn’t last forever.
……..” Racing through the streets, in a sparkling 4 wheel drive.
Through endless city heat – Oh! It’s great to be alive.
The kids are in the back – crazed on Christmas junk;
You’ve filled old Santa’s sack, old son – But ya credit card is sunk…….
CHORUS:
Oh! Spend like hell – get smashed as well. ‘Twould drive ya round the bend.
Ain’t it swell to be in the vice of the endless earn and spend.
Oh what the heck – it’s just your neck – don’t think about it mate.
Drink and drive, but stay alive – it’s ya destiny with fate.”
Tune: Jingle Bells. ©ML 7/12/04
Some more great song opening lines. I can’t be arsed crediting and commenting on ‘em, not least ‘cos I shortly hafta jump in the shower and make m’self pretty for the night. Google and make up your own comments you lazy pricks.
“Busted flat in Baton Rouge, waiting for a train. And I’m feeling nearly as faded as my jeans.”
“At words poetic I’m so pathetic that I always have found it best
Instead of getting ‘em off my chest, to let ‘em rest – unexpressed.”
“I know a girl from a lonely street, cold as ice cream, but still as sweet.”
“Hey Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand?”
“I woke up this morning with the sundown shinin’ in.”
“The screen door slams, Mary’s dress sways. Like a vision she dances across the porch as the radio plays.”
“She wanted to test her husband. She knew exactly what to do.”
“Have you heard, among this clan, I am called “The forgotten man”?”
“Diamonds, a fur coat, champagne. A woman, a curl of lash, cocaine.”
I think that every case above, you can see the film unfold in your heart’s eye. Speaking of which, some bonus Suicide. Check out the female lead’s acting, especially her eyes.
“I was sitting in the Hollywood Hawaiian Hotel
I was staring in my empty coffee cup
I was thinking that the gypsy wasn’t lyin’
All the salty margaritas in Los Angeles
I’m gonna drink ‘em up”
-Desperados Under the Eaves, Warren Zevon.
Actually, pretty hard to cut that one off after just 4 lines – a lonely jaded masterpiece. Do yourself a favour &c &c…
Matrafact, take it away Wozza:
“Well, he went down to dinner in his Sunday best
[Excitable boy, they all said]
And he rubbed the pot roast all over his chest
[Excitable boy, they all said]
Well, he’s just an excitable boy”
And for j_p_z:
“She was a fast machine
She kept the motor clean
She was the best damn woman
that I ever seen”
-Shook Me All Night Long, Accadacca
Sure it lacks His Bonness, but still their best opening lyric.
“When the iceberg hit,
Oh they must have known,
God moves on the water
Like Casey Jones.”
-14th of April, Gillian Welch
From Nabs’ more WTF? Category – any connection to the meaning of the rest of the song is purely coincidental.
“You went uptown riding in your limousine
In your fine park avenue clothes
You had the dom perignon in your hand
And the spoon up your nose”
-Big Shot, Billy Joel
A sermon on ego-moderation from BJ? Priceless!
“Called to see if your back was still aligned”
-Kissing The Lipless, The Shins
Also contains the lines “you’ve got too much to wear on your sleeve / and it’s too much to do with me / and secretly I want to bury in the yard / the grey remains of a friendship scarred”. James Mercer does angst real good.
“In the logbook of the LRC
Well I knew I’d find something
A hundred stories sitting there to read
I got my focals out, I put them on”
-Ode to the LRC, Band of Horses
Okay, now everyone disable your GenX irony filters…
“I got my first real 6-string
Bought it at the Five ‘n’ Dime
Played it till my fingers bled…”
Richard Thompson – 1952 Vincent Black Lightning.
Sure it’s 90 per cent brilliant delivery, but ya gotta give it up for Richard O’Brien…
“It’s astounding.
Time is fleeting.
Madness takes its toll.”
Also I get a kick out of the sly humor of the Heads in
“Think of London: a small city.”
And of course if you’ve already decided to call a song “Psycho Killer,” what better opening gambit than
“I can’t seem to face up to the facts.
I’m tense n nervous n I can’t relax.”
This one isn’t rock n roll (except in the sense of its sheer daring) but I find very haunting and beautiful the opening lines of this modern opera…
“Will it get some wind for the sailboat.
And it could get for it is.
It could get the railroad for these workers.
It could be Frankie.
It could be Frankie.
It could be a balloon.
It could be very fresh and clean.
Oh these are the days my friends
And these are the days my friends.”
– from “Einstein on the Beach”,
Knowles (words)/Glass (music)/Wilson (book)
More Talking Heads..”Electric Guitar”
Since I’m in a Suicide kinda mode (the band not the action), prepping for a hot and potentially dangerous date (where the fuck are my cufflinks) I leave you with:
(be sure to click on “more info” for the unusual provence of this clip)
and
“You are hardcore, you make me hard. You name the drama and I’ll play the part”.
Speaking of which, the Gyllenhaal/Spader flick “Secretary” is great (though gets a bit boggy before the climax) and with a brill Angelo Badalamenti soundtrack.
“It’s only forever
Not long at all…”
Well aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllllllll right everybody…..
Noddy Holder.
Oh yes, speaking of Bowie.
“I, I will be king. And you, you will be queen.”
“Baby, I’ve been breaking glass in your room again”
“Time – He’s waiting in the wings
He speaks of senseless things
His script is you and me, boy
Time – He flexes like a whore
Falls wanking to the floor
His trick is you and me, boy”
Let’s face it, very few of his lyrics ever made sense but they were always full of great quotable lines. As ole Uncle Dave always intended.
“I’m the laughing gnome and you can’t catch me.”
And y’all can relax now. Found my ancestral cufflinks.
A wet summer dusk in Sydney with juuust the right attitude:
Train
I ride goes to God knows where
I don’t know and I don’t care
If you aint got money don’t despair
‘Cause you don’t have to pay no fare
I love tha’ tubes for instant cultural feedback:
Just been playing this loud while wrestling with my bloody cufflinks,
“Oh baby, what a place to be, in the service of the bourgeoisie.”
Is my bow tie straighr?
What else would it be Nabs? It’s not like you are a sweet transvestite now is it?
Sorry, just continuing my rocky obsession.
I love Tim in suspenders I have to say.
I was working in the lab late one night
When my eyes beheld an eerie sight
or
My baby does the hanky panky
My baby does the hanky panky
or
Is she really going out with him?
Well, there she is. Let’s ask her.
Betty, is that Jimmy’s ring you’re wearing?
“The screen door slams, Mary’s dress sways. Like a vision she dances across the porch as the radio plays.”
Damn, I knew someone would get in first with that.
But speaking of Jacques Brel and if we’re allowed to have French:
Bien sûr, nous eûmes des orages
Vingt ans d’amour, c’est l’amour fol
Zorronsky @8, quelle horrible. Why don’t they pay one to sit on the sofa and watch your favourite TV programs, or read books or sleep?
Ah wouldn’t it be nice to get on with me neighbours
Lazy Sunday Afternoon Small Faces 1967
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3vSPxHvB_g
Thne taxman’s taken all my dole
Sunny Afternoon The Kinks 1967
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1h1oRP7FfBw&feature=related
They seek him here, they seek him there
Dedicated Follower of Fashion The Kinks
People try to put us d-down (Talkin’ ’bout my generation)
My Generation The Who
You think we look pretty good together
Substitute The Who
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ8Ra1JdtI0
They ripped it from the Book of Revelations but
Woe to you O earth and sea for the Devil sends the beast with wrath because he knows the time is short
Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast for it is a human number.
Its number is six hundred and sixty six.
is still a mighty metal moment.
Charles Aznavour – The Ham
Shit translation to English but boy does it rhyme!
If you’re looking for trouble, I’m the man to see.
If you’re looking for satisfaction, satisfaction guaranteed.
Of it course the above rides in one of the great intros of all time. Absolutely stomping when performed live.
First up, some songs mentioned earlier which absolutely deserve some links:
Ode to LRC by Band of Horses
Powderfinger by Neil Young and Crazy Horse
And now my nominations…
Jesus Built My Hotrod by Ministry
Click on the link for the opening lines…
And another vehicle-themed song (but more subdued):
Speeding Motorcycle by Daniel Johnston (the link is the cover by Yo La Tengo)
Speeding motorcycle, won’t you change me?
In a world of funny changes
Speeding motorcycle, won’t you change me?
And some others:
Ask by the Smiths
Shyness is nice, and
Shyness can stop you
From doing all the things in life
You’d like to
Good Vibrations by the Beach Boys
I love the colorful clothes she wears
And the way the sunlight plays upon her hair
Estuary Bed by the Triffids
The children are walking back from the beach
Sun on the sidewalk is burning their feet
And the Pogues are always great:
The Broad Majestic Shannon
The last time I saw you was down at the Greeks
There was whiskey on Sunday and tears on our cheeks
Dirty Old Town by Ewan MacColl (the link is the cover by the Pogues)
I met my love by the gas works wall
Dreamed a dream by the old canal
“Die Lorelei” by Heinrich Heine (1822), music by Friedrich Silcher (1837)
Translation (mine):
Here’s the usual one or you may want one that rhymes
Really it doesn’t work nearly as well in another language, so for music go for Erich Kunz or Richard Tauber
Or for something lighter:
It’s a traditional German student drinking song, but looking through the YouTubes I don’t think anyone sings it anymore. For something really gross try this.
Here’s what happens if you drink the beer before you sing.
Sorry I can’t offer any links to my offering at #59 – but if you’d like to join me down by the creek one evening we can boil the billy and give it a bit of a shot. I’ll chase the red-backs out of the stomach steinway. Altogether now……”Racing through the streets, ………”
It’s good Merv. Which Creek?
“The boy stood on the burning deck.
The deck was made of brass …”
Should I mewntion I nearly choked to death yesterday? A very scary few minutes. Normally, I delight in living alone. But this was one occasion when it would have been handy to have some-one here to thump me on the back. Anyway, I’m okay now.
Good to hear Paul.
The living bit, not the choking bit.
Is it just my imagination or is it very quiet on LP at the moment? I’ll have to resort to reading the Guardian.
It’s hard to perform The Heimlich Manoeuvre by yourself Paul. Glad you managed to pop it, somehow.
Ok, this has to be the top song opening line….
Holly came from Miami FLA…
“She came from Planet Claire.
I knew she came from there.”
– the ’52s
“Well I’m about to get sick
From watching my TV…”
– Zappa/Mothers, “Trouble Every Day”
…which also has the best LAST lines:
“…so watch the rats go across the floor
And make up songs about bein’ poor.”
back to openings…
“She had a face like a cook I’d seen
In the kitchen of the Anchor Hotel.”
– Royal Trux
PaulB @ 86:
No new posts since this one 3 days and 9 hours ago.
I’m working on one that isn’t the usual miserable climate change stuff or similar, but I have to go out to work on my real job today. Tonight should see it finished.
“Just yesterday morning
They let me know you were gone”
-Fire and Rain, James Taylor
“I am not in love, but I’m open to persuasion.
-Love and Affection, Joan Armatrading
“Well, I guess it would be nice if I could touch your body”
-Faith, George Michael
“I come awake, with the gift for womankind. You’re still alseep, but the gift don’t seem to mind”
-Wake Up and Make Love to Me, Ian Dury
“I woke up in a SoHo doorway, a Policeman knew my name”
-Who Are You?, The Who
“Don’t start me talking
I could talk all night”
-Oliver’s Army, Elvis Costello
“Is it worth it?
A new winter coat and shoes for the wife
And a bicycle on the boy’s birthday”
-Shipbuilding, Elvis Costello (some other dude wrote the tune though… *googles*… Clive Langer)
What’s the Heimlich Manoevre, joe2?
I just coughed and heaved and wheezed over the sink and drank glasses of water till the chook came up. S’pose the risk of choking is the price we pay for the gift of speech.
I’ve been trying to think of the opening lines of a song, but I don’t listen to music much and can’t remember any Leonard Cohen or Bob Dylan at the moment. (My favourite Dylan is Sad-eyed Lady of the Lowlands. I’d quote that if I could remember it.)
Another piece of useless trivia – 2009 was the 150th anniversary of Dickens’s Tale of Two Cities as well as Darwin’s Origin of the Species. Is it a sad commentary on our times that the former has not had as much, hardly any, fuss about it compared to Darwin’s book.
You know, if it wasn’t for that whiny nero dog, I would have had the last say on that thread.
Black Dog. Do you want to be any more obvious? Why don’t you bugger off back to the Prisoner of Azkaban and take your self indulgent dementers with you, you big fat pork chop. It should have been me.
Mervyn – and here’s me thinking that my old man was the only one who called it a stomach Steinway. He’s gone now but I still have it, a 120 bass Scandalli that he bought in Italy in 1945, in between dodging American fighters strafing his Allied airfield. He made a case for it, out of bits of a downed B24 Liberator, which for some unfathomable reason he threw away a couple of years before he died. Actually, on relfection, many of the things he did were unfathomable.
“Stand! In the end, you’ll still be you.”
– Sly Stone
“In this land of strangers,
There are dangers.”
– Pixies
“There is always some advantage
To be wielded, and brought to bear.”
– Graham Parker
“Well this is a song called ‘Alice’s Restaurant.’
It’s about Alice.
And the restaurant.
Except that ‘Alice’s Restaurant’ isn’t really the name of the restaurant.
It’s just the name of the song.
That’s why I called the song ‘Alice’s Restaurant.’”
– Woody’s boy
“The big man arrives.
Disco dancers greet him.
Plainclothes cops greet him.”
– Joni Mitchell, a great short story disguised as a song
A boy is born in hard time Mississippi
Surrounded by four walls that ain’t so pretty
Standing on the corner,
Suitcase in my hand
Put on your red dress, baby
Ya know we’re goin’ out tonight
Midnight rockers
City slickers
Gunmen and maniacs
All will feature on the freakshow
Living easy, living free
Season ticket on a one-way ride
I put on spell on you
because your mine
we got married in a fever
hot than a pepper sprout
You keep saying you’ve got something for me.
something you call love
Jolene, jolene, jolene, jolene
Im begging of you please don’t take my man
Well you can’t sleep in my bed no more
You can’t a-ride in my car
Now you wanna know the reason
Why I cheated on you
Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
stevie, lou, tommy, massive, acca, screaming jay, johnny & june, lee, dolly, tex, tim, queen
Bugger. Should be coffee first, post second.
……Hotter than a pepper sprout
…..Because you’re mine
I get violent
When I’m fucked up
I get silent
When I’m drugged up
(Clash)
I guess they really could’ve stopped right there…
I know some of you are interested, so here’s my latest history post.
http://beingahistoryheadandotherthings.blogspot.com/2009/12/david-collins-and-robert-ross.html#comments
Hope youse don’t mind.
Jo: scremaing jay H http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=orNpH6iyokI puts a spell on ya? while Howlin Wolf gets on with it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1FK620bS7A
“Well I’m a-runnin’ down the road tryin’a loosen my load
I got seven women on my mind
Four that wanna own me, two that wanna stone me
One says she’s a friend of mine”
-Take it Easy, Jackson Browne via The Eagles
Fascinating. Don’t think I could’ve done it.
Na Paul ya need a j thruster.
Well, if it happens again Paul, the important thing to remember is that at a certain point, coughing and wheezing and drinking water won’t be enough (in fact they’ll just speed up loss of consciousness).
In which case:
1)Lean backwards over the back of a chair, sofa, table or other sturdy surface, with the edge of the surface near the middle of your back.
2)Push your fists violently (enough to hurt nicely, maybe bruise a little) into your chest just below the ribcage.
3a)Breathe deeply, then smile ruefully and clean up the mess
3b)Fail and die (it’ll never be as good as someone behind you who knows what they’re doing, as the x said to the y)
Joe2 @ 83: which creek? I suppose I could be silly and say the one on the road to Why-kick-a-moo-cow, or on the right just before ya get to Kick-a-can-along.
But to be closer to reality I’d have to say East Ithaca Creek, near its’ headwaters (on Mt Coot-tha). It’s actually got some water in it at the mo and the mozzies are something fierce. I tried hiding in the empty water tank – just to get a few hours peace, from them and the kids – and they were sticking their hooters (the mozzies that is, not the kids) through the blooming tin (I’ll admit it’s a little rusty, but still and all – through the tin mate!) I would have bent those probicous-probichee things over with me axe, but I heard about a fella up north tried that and the bloomin mozzies took off and carted him and his tank miles and miles into the scrub!
Phil@vvB @ 94. I have a 120 bass Scandalli stomach steinway. My problem is my stomach isn’t big enough to sit it on (didn’t get fed pasta when I were a young-un), which means my arms hardly can get the umph to pull the thing back together – once it’s fully extended. Lovely pieces of work though – in the right hands. If you don’t keep using them, the plastic keepers on the inside of the bass buttons perish and fall off – and then you get a constant note spoiling an already poor performance! Bit of plastic from of-a 2 core electrical flex does a pretty good job as replacement. Charles Magnanti wrote a pretty straightforward book on how to get them going. Simple really – the second inner row of bass buttons are all in 5ths – forget all the other rows until you get that those sorted. But I’d better go and see what them dam Billy Lids are up ta…….
“then you get a constant note spoiling an already poor performance!”
Instant bagpipes!
Dying to find out how Nabakov (shouldn’t that be Nabokov?)’s date went? By his absence here today, I assume it either went really well or his date was as dangerous as he suggested and he’s fish food somewhere! Bow tie and ancient cufflinks suggests something very sordid. Does anyone really wear cufflinks these days anyway? And bow ties? What’s that all about? Hope she was worth it. I’m picturing Richard Gere for some reason. The pretty woman one not the one involved with gerbils and Jennifer Keyte. Or was that Johnny Diesel? I forget. Anyway, Mr Nabakov, wherever you are, please spill… or not …
Alifi my larder
Alifi my larder
I’m not your larder
I can’t forsake you or
Forsqueak you
Alifi my larder
Robert Wyatt
http://myfxadvice.com trading platform</a provider.
Eric, did you get to M. Wyatt via my Shipbuilding reference earlier?
Just curious – if not it would be just… curious.
AC/DC’s best opening line – surely Bon Scott’s ode to pubic lice, Crabsody in Blue?
Well they move on down
And they crawl around
Walkin’ sideways
Sideways walkin’
Gives me the blues
Dedicated to all AGW denialists, sceptics and trolls everywhere:
I use public toilets
And piss on the seat
Walk around in summertime
Sayin’ ‘How ’bout this heat’.
“I was dreaming when I wrote this”, 1999, Prince
“I’ve been a bad, bad girl”, Criminal, Fiona Apple
“You never close your eyes anymore when I kiss your lips”, You’ve lost that loving feeling, Righteous Brothers
“Hello, Darkness, my old friend”, Sound of Silence, Simon and Garfunkel
“I am an anti Christ”, Anarchy in the UK, Sex Pistols
“She was just seventeen, you know what I mean”, I saw her standing there, the Beatles
“I was born in a cross-fire hurricane”, Jumping Jack Flash, Rolling Stones
“She’s a very kinky girl”, Super Freak, Rick James
–The Righteous Brothers’
Last one was meant to include “Oh my love, my darling, I hunger for your touch”, Unchained melody.
Not according to The Plice.
“Everybody knows the deal is rotten
Old Black Joe’s still pickin’ cotton
For your ribbons and bows
And everybody knows”.
Leonard Cohen.
James @ 111,
Thinking about it I’d go for “Let me tell you a story, about a woman I know.”
“Imagine there’s no heaven”, Imagine, John Lennon
“Baby I’m amazed at the way you love me all the time, Maybe I’m afraid of the way I love you”, Maybe I’m amazed, Paul McCartney
FDB @ 105,
I suspect its a bit wonky anyway.
Gawd! If I tried to lie on my kitchen table and do all that, with my luck it’d collapse while I was on it.
Nevertheless, I’m going to be a lot more careful next time I cook up a whole chicken with vewgetables in me crockpot, then try to eat some of it in a darkened room while watching TV. Bloody modern inventions!
“Every time I think of you, I always catch my breath”, Missing you, John Waite
“You walked into the party, Like you were walking onto a yacht”, You’re So Vain, Carly Simon
For your inner three-year-old, The Snowman by Raymond Briggs brought to life as an animation with orchestra, almost wordless.
BTW, I softly condemn j_p_z for disallowing Beatles songs.
Very droll, Brett. I think Lolita is now spelt “jail bait”!
I agree, the BBC list is pretty poor, although the Manic Street Preachers line in their list is one of my favourites:
“Libraries gave us power, then work came to make us free. What price now for a shallow piece of dignity?”
- Manic Street Preachers, “A Design For Life”
I don’t think that line really reflects the lyrical genius of the Manic Street Preachers, however, so here are a few more:
“Images of suntan, perfection and napalm”
- Manic Street Preachers, “Ifwhiteamericatoldthetruthforonedayitsworldwouldfallapart”
“Life has been unfaithful, and it all promised so so much”
- Manic Street Preachers, “La Tristesse Durera (Scream To A Sigh)”
“What’s the point in an education, when you have to pay for the privilege?”
- Manic Street Preachers, “Socialist Serenade”
“Between the billboard masturbation across highways of metallic isolation
there lies the deafening screaming of the millions wiping out the diseased pages
of apathy that bleed our innocence…”
- Manic Street Preachers, “Love’s Sweet Exile”
“London, England, consider yourselves warned.
Repeat after me, Fuck queen and country!”
- Manic Street Preachers, “Repeat (UK)”
“Always feeling torn and slow, love song cull destroy poem/ Misery and trauma making love, best go shoot the fucking doves”
- Manic Street Preachers, “Condemned to Rock ‘N’ Roll”
“The future teaches you to be alone, the present to be afraid and cold./ So if I can shoot rabbits, then I can shoot fascists”
- Manic Street Preachers, “If You Tolerate This Your Children Will Be Next”
For shocking violence:
I was a fighter always looking for trouble
And my life was so empty, there was nothing left to live for
But then it happened one night as I got into a fight…
*shudders*
(Actually, having regularly worshipped at the wall of sound, I have a lot of time for ABBA…although “He is your Brother” isn’t their greatest. For what it’s worth next year they’ll be joining AC/DC in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. I think they’re generally underrated, much like the Beach Boys at least used to be.)
And since I’ve mentioned the wall of sound, just for fun, here are the opening lines of the greatest song ever written about a boy named Bill:
I met him on a Monday and my heart stood still
Da doo ron ron ron, da doo ron ron
Somebody told me that his name was Bill
Da doo ron ron ron, da doo ron ron
Good God don’t jump
The boy stood on the ledge
An old man who had fainted was revived
Save the life of my child – Simon and Garfunkel
quickly followed by
Let us be lovers, we’ll marry our fortunes together
I’ve got some real estate here in my bag
America – S&G
Shame on us all for not mentioning:
“A well a everybody’s heard about the bird.”
Lyrically, I think the first lyrics are “Waaaaaaaah, Hooo.” It has never been beaten. The Legendary Stardust Cowboy. I declare this contest over.
Here’s another from Simon and Garfunkel:
April, come she will
When streams are ripe and swelled with rain
…April Come She Will.
“Give me a reason, why I’m feeling this way”, I don’t need love, Johnny Diesel & the Injectors
The Department of Redundancy Department have instructed me to issue an apology for @127. I’m sorry and I apologise.
Openin’ lines are for beginners. You need the chorus if you want to get to the heart of the matter and “Baby, baby, Ain’t it true, I’m immortal when I’m with you” is so succinct it makes most pop/rock C1960-2009 redundant, and the coda takes care of the rest.
… and furthermore, the transliteration of the sound of the airconditioner unit in the final verse of Desperaradoes under the Eaves is the most poignant moment in modern music and the final lines of Time the Revelator by Gillian Welch unmasks us all as fakes and imitators. JPZ, are you tricking us all into the eternal hoax of the ‘new’ and ‘reborn’ with your focus on first lines, is this some devilish seque into the hocus pokery of new years resolutions and faux christian tropes of resurrection? I’ll have no truck with that, thank you very much – the dying moments of a year are the times to celebrate endings.
Waiting, watching the clock
It’s four o’clock it’s got to stop…
For me, the song that injected a dose of many people’s – well, women’s – everyday reality into popular culture.
The silver spoon’s in the mouth, baby clothes are baby blue.
Nothing’s ever handed down, everything’s brand new.
(Kate McGarrigle, ‘First Born’, about her son Rufus Wainwright)
‘I don’t believe in an interventionist God
But I know, darling, that you do…’
Nick Cave Into My Arms
Not nit not nit no not
Nit nit folly bololey
What a beautiful thread!
Buon natale, all you posters and commenters alike
‘Cause I like to post entire songs, and in light of Copenhagen blues:
This Heat: A New Kind Of Water
eat, drink and be merry
for tomorrow we did
eat electricity
drink five of the seven seas
here is a paralyzed sleet
here is a bubble bath rain
acrid stench and festering tongue
new york, moscow, nairobi in flames
i don’t know either, what is the answer?
we were told to expect more
and now that we’ve got more
we want more, we want more
we have moved from a to x
this welfare state is our progress
the size of it all carries us all along
more equals better, it’s what we want
our energy is endless it seems
it’s there when we need it
we’ve got men on the job
we finance clinics to research
a cure for cancer, our least vague fear
a new kind of water
a new way of breathing
always somehow a wonder cure all
turns up when we need it
we’ve got men on the job
you know from experience
the creature comforts, a house that’s warm
your body would choose all this
of course! it’s innate we’re selfish
but what if there’s not enough to go round?
defence is needed
we’ve got some odd men in odd jobs
we have moved from a to z
this nuclear state is our demise
fly away peter, hide away paul
who can watch as the earth burns, shatters and dies?
failsafe, foolproof, we’ve heard that before
good sense is needed
let’s hope we’ve got men on the job
“Pretty women out walkin’ with gorillas down my street”, Is she really going out with him?, Joe Jackson
“I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand, Walking through the streets of Soho in the rain, He was looking for a place called Lee Ho Fook’s, Going to get himself a big dish of beef chow mein”, Werewolves of London, Warren Zevon.
Fantastic song and lyrics eg “He’s the hairy-handed gent who ran amuck in Kent, lately he’s been overheard in Mayfair, Better stay away from him, He’ll rip your lungs out, Jim, I’d like to meet his tailor … I saw a werewolf drinking a pina colada at Trader Vic’s, His hair was perfect!”
I’m with Su – opening lines are for beginners. The chorus is tha thing. Henceforth Lyall Lovett:
And if the stars didn’t shine on the water
Then the sun wouldn’t burn on the sand
And if I were the man you wanted
I would not be the man that I am
Hey Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand..?
“Delilah” and I’ll show you, legendary “Cowboys”*, Shauny@127
*contains leftist backing chorus*
What do we all make of the execution of British National Akmal Shaikh by the Chinese Government?
So soon after the Beijing Olympics where last year, China was welcomed with open arms by the West, it seems that the mighty dragon is only too eager to remind the rest of the developed world who is really in charge of the 21st century global economy.
It may well be the shape of things to come.
But at what point (if any) does the developed world have a moral obligation to say enough is enough…???
More here….
http://guttertrash.wordpress.com/2009/12/30/whats-up-china/
“the transliteration of the sound of the airconditioner unit in the final verse of Desperaradoes under the Eaves is the most poignant moment in modern music”
I’ve had this outro chorus stuck in my head ever since first mentioning the song upthread 2 days ago. Vocals arranged by Carl Wilson no less.
Harrumph!
The silly season is no time for moderation.
FDB @ 143 – I trust your “Harrumph!” was in the same spirit as my own amazement when I saw that “enough is enough” comment on China and capital punishment at 142.
Doesn’t anyone watching these vigils and prayers and petitions on behalf of the unfortunate man in China remember Derek Bentley the teenager hanged in Britain in 1952 after a trial now accepted as “grossly unfair”, whose execution was “nothing short of cruel given his mental age, mental defects and epilepsy” and despite the jury at the time making a plea for mercy, which was ignored.
And doesn’t reb of Hobart know that the developed world has no right, much less obligation, to say enough is enough to China when the so called leader of the free world, the good old US of A, is itself still using the death penalty and unlikely to change in the near future.
This is not the right thread for comment on this issue. I trust there will be a more appropriate LP posting soon. Meanwhile for those concerned there’s plenty of info at the Death Penalty Information Centre website.
Or the first verse, especially if it contains some Spanish:
Spanish is a loving tongue
Soft as music, light as spray.
Was a girl he learned it from
Living down Sonora way.
He don’t look much like a lover
But he says her love words over,
Mostly when he’s all alone -
Mi amor, mi corazon
Or a song from Joni M for tomorrow night, which is a New Year’s Eve blue moon:
Once in a while, in a big blue moon,
there comes a night like this:
like some surrealist
invented this
Fourth of July night ride home.
Reb @142
I’m against capital punishment anywhere at any time including for those guilty of truly heinous crimes on a large scale, but I’m not sure what you propose when you suggest it is time for the west to say “enough is enough”. I might add that capital punishment is either just or it is not, and if the latter is the case then it should not be merely unfortunate westerners who cause whatever it is you want to do in response, but the executions of locals as well. Of course, much of what occurs in China is beyond the pale of notions of due process in the more liberal parts of the west and ultimately this too should elicit our outrage.
It would be a tad more impressive if we turned our attention to things we could do differently within opur opwn jurisdictions, and reviewing how we deal with illicit and illegal substances would be one obvious place to start. Another would be about why and under what circumstances we imprison.
Complaining about what others do is easy — but the fact reamins that many here in the west think capital punishment is OK in general and especially OK for drug traffickers.
“This is not the right thread for comment on this issue.”
I cannot agree with you on that Patricia WA@144*.
*see “…you can discuss anything you like” above.
(it being generally agreed that the “at your weekend leisure” extends for a while longer)
And no, PatWA, I was whining about a comment of mine getting sent to Coventry. Or purgatory, I forget. Theology is not a strong point of mine.
Sasha at comment 138:
I agree and, moreover, the opening lines meet both of the criteria outlined by Nabakov in comment 45:
A few weekends ago I was sitting in the car with my four year old when a local radio station started playing Werewolves of London. One of the most enjoyable ways to listen to this song: howling along with a four year old!
Whan that Aprill, with his shoures soote
The droghte of March hath perced to the roote
And bathed every veyne in swich licour,
G. Chaucer, “Prologue; Canterbury Tales”
at my weekend leisure
Interestingly, I watched some of God’s Little Acre on one of the digital channels the other night. Tina Louise was damn near unrecognisable and though the action was set in Georgia rather than Tennessee the cast of characters reminded one of the Clampetts from The Beverley Hillbillies.
“Darlin’ Jill” (an Ellie-Mae kind of character) was the object of amorous attewntion of some charatcer who looked like a sleazier, creepier, grottier and more snivelling form of Lou Costello but hwo played much the same role in the plot. There’s a scene in which she is doing the outdoor bath (bare shoulders and calves exposed on the rim of the bath in sudsy water). The Costello character (Pluto Swint) is lured forward eyes closed towards the bath by the blonde temptress whereupon he stumbles at the hand operated water pump and begins pumping it. Darlin’ Jill starts moaning her appreciation at the cool water sliding down her chin from the phallic spout as he pumps it (get the allusion?) and he sneaks a peek before being splashed. Hmmm … that’s how they did it the year I was born.
Meanwhile, her “por” (father) is seeking an “albino” who can help him locate buried treasure with his magical eye. Hmmm again …
Agreed Joe 2, but I did feel that this was too harsh an intrusion into some lovely reminiscing around song.
I was jolted back over half a century to my own teen years when Derek Bentley was hanged for a crime he didn’t commit but was judged to have incited murder by calling out “Let him have it, Chris!” to his slightly younger friend who actually shot the policeman. It’s less than ten years since he was officially pardoned after long petitioning by those who still felt the shame of that sentence and execution. I can still feel the injustice of it all and it being so clear to me that he was calling to Craig to give up the gun. That era for me is somehow grey, drab and shrouded in smog as I coughed and sneezed while I swotted my way through adolescence.
Tho’ the Beatles were already born and growing up in that England too.
In appropriate memory of the late Rowland S. Howard.
“I’ve been contemplating suicide,
But it really doesn’t suit my style,
So I think I’ll just act bored instead.”
That song deserves a link.
Its also the 150th anniversary of George Eliot’s Adam Bede, and Goncharov’s Oblomov. (the latter is an absolutely wonderful book. One of my favourites, but I have to confess, despite being a George Eliot fan, I’ve never actually finished Adam Bede. Tried twice.)
Its also the 150th anniversary of something obscure written by Marx, but I can’t remember what.
And, of course, Darwin’s Origin of the Species.
shit. bad news, Nabs.
This is a warning
A gun to the head thing
This is a sign
A don’t get out of bed thing…..
….Exit everything
Torch the throne
Kill the king
Exit everything
Rowland S. Howard.
Ah NabAkov (as in AbAcab?), the prodigal son returns from the murky wrist slashing music abyss with no news of his date? How goes it Bow Tie Boy? Truth is, all of us are committing suicide one way or another, the only thing that varies is the speed and the vehicle.
Which reminds me, “I can feel it coming in the air tonight”, Phil Collins. You boys just love that song don’t you? I don’t think it means what you think it means.
But Frankie goes to Hollywood’s “Relax” was less subtle. Surprised it made the airwaves at the time …
Oh for the love of God. Nabs please put Sasha out of her misery will you?
Thanks for the attempted intervention, Casey. I was just messing with Mr Nabakov. He seemed like an interesting, intelligent and funny guy and I thought he would be fun to spar with. Not to be. C’est la vie!
It was homecoming night at my high school
Everyone was there, it was totally cool
I was real excited, I almost wet my jeans
‘Cause my best friend Debbie was homecoming queen
Julie Brown, “The Homecoming Queen’s Got a Gun”
Rowland had been ill for a very long time with liver cancer. The damage heroin does.
Really? I thought it was the sauce.
Either way, a lovely bloke to work/chat with. Quite unassuming and very funny.
I’m troubled by the lyrics in Lady Marmalade
As most who have troubled to study French would know, the french verb se coucher is reflexive.
It follows that the key line in the chorus should be
I’m bothered every time I hear it …
oops … delete the last “vous” … there, I’ve over-compensated …
Fran Barlow @ #165…
Iss Nawlins Franch, chere. Iss diffunt.
Trah summa the gumbo, dahl. Mah wuhd, ih’ll chaaaaynj ya lahf.
Oh, and while I’m here…
Happy New Year, all you charmingly deluded lefties! May the new decade bring you clarity and common sense, without diminishing yr elan!
Improbable order I know, but… “shall I live in hope?/ All men I hope live so.”
Cheers!
Fran,
Let me set your mind at rest. Coucher certainly can be used reflexively, but does not have to be — and the meaning is quite different!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voulez-vous_coucher_avec_moi
Tres bien!
Thanks Paulus as it has long troubled me.
Strictly speaking one should translate se coucher as to place onesself in a position of repose though this is probably archaic and in more modern parlance it’s ‘self-bed’ in the same way one self-washes (se laver) and self-names (s’appeler). Thus si quelqu’un m’a couchée they have bedded me (or put me to bed).
Perhaps idiom rules prevail in a song or common speech.
Happy New Year, Fran.
So, you require your bedmate to be grammatical?
Good luck with that.
Vous vivez dans Australie, oui?
Has taken me nearly a week to eat a stockpot of vegetables and a whole chicken. Put it on Boxing Day and have just finished it. If I hadn’t bought up a little on Xmas junk food I reckon I might have saved up to $100 on food for the fortnight. I can’t believe it.
Might try a whole duck next week, if I can find one. And look round for new kinds of vegetables to go with it. Getting a bit sick of chicken.
French lovemaking grammarians parsing on new years day. Forgeddaboutit. As Tiger says, just do it. And be Italian while you are at it will you?
bellissima!
Sorry, but Ambigulous is clearly teasing and I for one am rising to the bait. Fran clearly knows her French and I can’t wait any longer for her to tell us that she lives “en Australie”.
That’s rather a nice image, Casey. The idea of French grammarians making love on New Years Day, I mean. Fran’s experience of Frenchmen propositioning her was clearly at a time when her language skills were more advanced than my own at that stage of my life. My few months as an “au paire” left me still somewhat mute in my few days alone in Paris before returning to London. It didn’t seem to matter though. I had a pretty good time anyway!
Paul have you tried a small leg of lamb in the crock pot? Just add onion, carrot, celery and a can of italian tomatoes plus a bit of white wine. Just like lamb shanks only better because you get more meat. You can skim the fat off the top, if you care about the old arteries, near the end. Bon Appétit.
Quite right, Patricia. Of course, I live (vive) in Australia, but more pertinently, J’habite en Australie. Resort to demeurer would also be OK.
Apparently, people speaking French with my somewhat Anglicised inflexion was as alluring in 1979 as we normally consider people speaking English with French inflexion.
A pen friend whom I viosted that year excitedly placed me in front of her English teacher to exchange pleasantries, and it was an engaging experience. Her teacher’s accent though not really like any English variant I’d ever heard before was nonetheless very pleasant in a je ne sais quoi kind of way.
Oops … smack on the wrist for me
Truncating sentences leads to error …
Thanks Fran. There are so many subtleties in French and such a delight to see on the page and to hear in one’s head. I have been toying with the idea of a new language to learn as a strategy for developing new neural pathways in this old brain of mine. I’m wondering if perfecting my French, or even German, might do instead, since tho’ I’ve taught both in schools but without formal language quals I know how little I know.
Is there anyone on LP who knows more than basic stuff about the”plastic brain” who might have an opinion on this? I have already tapped into a few sites and will go on asking around. Meanwhile “je vis dans l’espoir”?? See, I’m not sure if it should be “en espoir” or “dans l’espoir” even after visiting a rapid translation site which gave me “dans l’espoir”.
I’d say neither Patricia …
Better Il faut vivre d’espoir or possibly vivre avec l’espoir
Another might be vivre pendant qu’on tienne de l’espoir literally to live (living) while holding onto hope
Sometimes it’s better to avoid translation.
German may be a better target for brain plasticity work as its syntax is further from English. You’ve read Doidge I presume?
danke schoen, meine Damen.
i have only a few words of these languages, mein Deutsch ist sehr schlecht, auch.
joe2 @ 176,
will try that. Got a few other recipes from last week, too.
What I was thinking of was a whole duck in the stockpot adding a large tin of plums + juice, large tin half peaches plus juice, large tin of half pears + juice, some tinned mango + juice,a couple of sticks of celery, some chinese vegetables, a tablespoon of sugar, a dash of salt and pepper and a touch of grated or chopped ginger, maybe a touch of coconut creaM.
Of course, it might be utterly bloody disastrous. What do youse think, yes or no?
Ja, Fran, ich habe Doidge gelesen! So those particular neural pathways are still there after thirty years! But German is not really charming or fun to listen to. I’ve often thought the French are probably not as great lovers as their reputation suggests. They just sound so romantic and seductive.
Ambigulous, never mind how bad your German is, your name was enough to pre-dispose me to enjoying your comments and humour from the very first time I happened on this site, and kept returning because of you and your ilk!
Your “Bellissima!” today stirred memories of reading Guiccardini and Machiavelli as a student. I’d chosen Renaissance Italy as a special subject because it required a trip to Florence and Sienna, the drawback being we had to read sources in the original, which required a lot of swot with Arthur Waley’s wife as tutor. I was no linguist and my medieval Italian with its English overtones must have seemed pretty quaint to the Italians. Not that they laughed! They just waved their hands around a lot and said “Bellissima! Bellissima!” all the time!
Back to Doidge and the plastic brain. I am worried that all my neural pathways lead me not to Rome, or even Copenhagen, but back to childhood or adolescence and the world of WWII and the fifties. I have to develop different mental highways. 2010 is to be my year of new thinking. Not magical, just modern.
It sounds wildly adventurous, Paul, @182. I would be inclined to stick with just one fruit and build the dish around it and a favourite fresh herb or spice, but heh that’s just me. Never stand in the way of creativity!
I am a big fan of the crock pot and have been using it for years. My favourite dish is making large batches of bolognaise sauce. It is great to cook the sauce out for three or four hours without the worry of catching on the bottom. Then I freeze for 3 or 4 meals with different types of pasta.
Have a gander at this dish for an idea…peking duck dans le crock.
http://crockpot365.blogspot.com/2008/12/crockpot-peking-duck-recipe.html
Joe2 and Paul, somehow anything prepared and cooked at low heat, long and slow, is bound to be good, like a few other things in life, I guess. Crock pots are great for that, but they do confine you to one dish at a time. The slow cooking method can be much more versatile than that by cooking several meals ahead for a few days in one go.
I still have a great little Penguin Handbook, “Leave it to Cook” by Stella Atterbury from 1968. She suggests putting as many covered dishes as possible into a slow oven overnight. It’s a great way do things like your spaghetti sauce, Joe, plus macaroni or cauliflower cheese and even shepherd’s pie which you’d brown under the grill after. You could tuck in veggies like ratatouille, or split pea soup and potatoes wrapped in foil and even desserts like stewed prunes or rhubarb and apple for topping with crumble later, and chutneys, (not jams tho’ – the sugar wd burn). Every corner of every shelf could be used because the low heat stayed constant at about 170F.
I’m sure this method’s being used nowadays. It’s great on fuel economy and needing only minimal preparation ideal for working mums, and dads, and guys and gals…….. Still I guess you get the same sort of fuel efficiency and possibly more fun with the one spectacular dish at a time in a large crock pot parcelled into freezer packages for defrosting later.
Ah, the juice from de duck. That hadn’t occurred to me. Spose I could microwave the duck first, then chuck it into the simmering fruit and fruit juice for a four to six hour slow cook.
As for the circular rack:
a) I don’t have one.
b) wouldn’t it result in all the duck fat being on the bottom of the stockpot instead of floating on the top, where you can skim it off. Or, floating to the top and getting an awful lot of gunk on the rack on the way up? (Thus making washing up after horrendous.) Maybe I’m thick, but I don’t get the physics of that.
Love the crockpot and the slow oven, joe2 and Patricia WA.
The crockpot is perfect for being able to go out to work all day and leave it on the bench cooking and then coming home to..yum.
But rather than having the oven on overnight Patricia WA, I often have it on low from first thing in the morning when I’m at home during winter, and then just keep putting in dishes as the day goes by. Heats up most of the house, the house smells of whatever is being baked and lots of warm wintery food/cakes to eat all and/or freeze etc. Hhmm, slow baked quinces.
And very unlike this time of year when even the stovetop doesn’t get much of a work-out, with so many salad veggies in season.
Paul, I’m with joe2, maybe just one fruit… And why the cans esp. at this time of year. So much fruit is in season and for cooking purposes, maybe could you find some cheap fresh fruit to stew/cook with esp. if you are going to spend up big on a duck. Def. worth it for the flavour!
A fruitbarn or a big fruit/veg shop will more likely have older stock properly discounted rather than Coles/Woolies supermarkets (whose fresh new produce is pretty crap and expensive). Is there one nearby or on a bus route?
Anyway Paul, keep us informed. You could also check out recipes online – read a few versions of the same dish from different sites and you’ll get a feeling for what is a well-tested recipe. Good luck.
The circular rack mentioned is interesting Paul. This bird- she has a blog that is totally involved in crocking- has cleverly turned her crock into an oven. Value adding at it’s best. Too bad you do not have one because it rescues the duck from becoming stew. Not that stew is a bad thing if you are in the mood for it.
Duck fat will rise to the top in the big liquid cook-up. Skim with a ladle into a glass bottle, then why not stick it into the fridge and use for roast vegetables? After all it is prized for this purpose by, slow public killing, TV chefs.
joe2,
Thanks, will do.
jo,
Its cheaper to buy tinned fruit in Bi Lo, and put it in the shopping trolley with other stuff I normally get, then off to get a cab home. The fresh fruit place is up and down the hill a bit out of the main shopping centre and its a litle difficult as my mobility is actually quite limited. (I can shuffle round the flat okay, but going more than 100 yards at one go, carrying anything slightly heavy is a bit of a tax.) So I like to get everything done at once and into an easily pushable trolley woithin 1 minute’s walk, if that, of the taxi rank.
Paul, maybe you could pick up some fresh fruit as a special treat to go with the duck at the Bi-Lo. Cans aren’t always cheaper, always worth looking at what’s on special. But cans store well that’s for sure!
You are in touch will all your available local support services up there aren’t you? In terms of home care, home shopping if available.
Our local Council ‘Meals on Wheels’ will just deliver the days you want or just frozen meals etc, if you want a few days off a week from cooking, is yours any good?
mille grazie, Signorina Patricia!
Your adventure in Italy sounds wonderful, thank you for relating this.
I enjoy reading your posts too, cheers!
On HomeCare: Get them to do housework. They will help with shopping if I need it, but, so far, despite the slowness I can manage by myself. Besides I enjoy my pension day cup of real coffee and, (usually) some sort of relatively exotic breakfast at one of the better town coffee shops. All bill paying places are close together and, more importantly, so are the good bookshops and second hand bookshops. I have quite a bit of fun on pension day.
I won’t use Meals on Wheels here. They’re too expensive, etc., and, besides I don’t like being tied to home every day, just in case I do decide to go out.
Any day that involves good coffee and books is a good day, Paul!
Add Sex and Drugs and Rock and Roll and it’s very good indeed.
Just the movie, of course!
Paul, good to know that you are getting the services that you require. The bookshops up there must be able to set a clock by your fortnightly visits.
joe2, I’ve just spent a happy afternoon pursuing the branches from you Ian Dury clip. Thanks.
Did you see this one, then, David Irving (no relation)? It’s my favourite Ian Dury number and he did some top stuff.
I will definitely see the movie on him when it comes out.
jo @ 195,
I even get a discount from one, I’m such a regular customer. Though I’ve been buying DVD’s there more than books lately.
Here’s my fave.
Anyone heard any of his son Baxter’s stuff?
I agree that its charms are modest, but it is wonderful fun to listen to — all those big words made, ever so logically, from the building blocks of smaller words. I particularly like all the street maps full of words of 97 letters, ending in ‘-strasse’, that translate into things like ‘The rather narrow street where one may patronise, if one so wishes, the cheese shop, the massage parlour and the poodle clipping place, unless it’s raining’.
Yeh, nice one that too FDB and what about Baxter? ya learn somthun new evry day.
Thanks again, joe2, and also FDB – I can see another “wasted” day ahead of me if I don’t exercise a bit of self-discipline.
PC – what could possibly be wrong with the language that gave us the word (and even the concept of) Schadenfreude? (We wouldn’t otherwise be able to express the feeling we get when considering, for example, the elevation of Tony Abbott to the leadership of the Opposition.) That’s the nice thing about a language that lets you make up new words so easily. It can also sound lovely when you’re hearing, for example, Rilke read aloud.
I think there are lots of charming individual words, brauchen and nimmermehr are more beautiful than their equivalents auf Englisch. Meine Ruh ist hin, mein Herz ist schwer, Ich finde sie nimmer und nimmermehr. /highschoolgerman
And Hundertwasser is a fabulous surname. As the owner of a less than charming germanic surname, I notice these things.
Er steht im Tor, im Tor, im Tor
Und Ich dahinter!
[/Goalkeeper's Girlfriend's song from yr9 Cherman]
If you want something picturesque try translating the sentence:
The bus drove past a row of half-timbered houses.
We laughed ourselves silly over that one in 3rd form with our German teacher.
Halftimberedhouses = brothels.
Gotcha.
I wonder if there are any half-timbered houses in Whakatane?
FDB@206
You’ve only scratched the surface. Try rendering the full sentence (ideally using the perfect tense)
(I now notice I left out the adjective “old” from the 1973 version of this exercise. I doesn’t matter that much but I just like the rhythm of the sentence with it in.)
ergo:
The bus drove past a row of old half-timbered houses.
safest to prononunce ‘Whakatane’ as Fokka…., su
and then there’s the minefild in Rotorua, where locals shorten Whakarewarewa to ‘Whaka’
not to mention ‘las vaccas‘* in Spanish
*the moo-cows
Ever wondered why Vick’s (the good people behind Vaporub) spell their name with a ‘W’ in Chermany?
Oh I don’t know FDB … surely it’s designed to fix you up?
In any event, FDB, the stem for the word is reminiscent of a word for something not much less amusing to those of prurient interest …
I dont care what anyone sez, I like Cherman.
Singen! “Hejo, spann den wagen an, den der Wind treibt regen ubers land….”
Ms LE doesnt give a crap, but Im really into her German-Australian ancestry (for our daughter’s sake). Down at the sugar farms outside Brisbane, where her ancestors ettled in the 1860s, all the gravestones are in German up to WW1 – and I gather her grandad, and the whole area, only stopped speaking German when WW2 started.
PS Only one c in vacas, Ambi.
Su @ 203
The artist Hundertwasser was a very creative genius in many ways and so too with his adopted name. Born Friedrich Stowasser he changed his name to Friedensreich Regentag Dunkelbunt Hundertwasser. Roughly translated ‘rich in peace”rainy day” darkly colourful’ ’100 waters’. The surname is a adaption from the slavic sto meaning one hundred. He came up with other linguistic marvels, such as “Forschritt ist Rückschritt, und der Rückschritt wird zum Fortschritt”. Probably one of the most underrated European artists in the 20th century in my opinion.
Oh and FDB, I have to mention the other goalkeeper song, for I still get renditions from German visitors when I introduce myself.
Der Theodor der Theodor
der steht bei uns im Fussballtor
wie der Ball auch kommt wie der Schuss auch fällt
der Theodor der hält!
What is it with Krauts and goalkeepers?
Moderated.
muchas gracias LE, und danke schoen. Those little vacas are still very appealing, even when spelt correctly. Can’t think why.
In the quaint hillside suburb of Heidelberg (Melb) rolling down to the river Yarra, at least two strasse names were changed to English ones, during the First World Unpleasantness. [Or as it was known at that time, the Great Unpleasantness].
If I may (mis)quote Tom Lehrer, “We sorted out the Chermans in 1918, and we’ve scarcely heard from them since!”
I too did ein wenig school-days-Cherman. Seems that many LPosters did, auch. I prefer the sounds of Franzoesisch oder Spanish, but.
It don’t sound too pretty but I’ve always found it sticks in me noggin better than anything else I’ve had a crack at.
Anywhere in the world, whatever phrase book I have in hand, wie komme Ich am besten zum Bahnhof bitte is what I really want to say.
Nehmen Sie die erste Strasse links, und…
ach, FDB! goalkeepers…..
Vielleicht die Deutschen denken dass, in fussball, defence is the best type of attack??? [Perheps zose Chermans sink zat....]
A friend who had grown up in Australia speaking Englisch, but whose parents were Cherman, was pleased when this happened in Swanston Strasse (Melb) one day. A bloke walking towards him said, “Wo ist der Bahnhof, bitte?”* and my friend answered in Cherman. Only half a minute later did her realise he had given directions in Cherman without hesitating. Very happy to have done so.
*Where is the railway station, please?
Ach, it’s all tucked away deep in ze krey metter, ja??
I still reckon the only three phases you need to know in any language are: “Can I have a small beer, please?”, “Is this edible?” and “I suppose casual sex is out of the question.”
The other truly classic Fussball song still sang by a sea of Oranje fans whenever the Dutch National team meets the Deutsche Fussballmanschafft.
“Wo haben sie mein Opa sein Fahrrad gelassen, gebt uns unsere Fahrräder zurück!”
A reference to the confiscation or mass theft of Dutch bicycles to recycle them into steel for the German war effort.
Ootz, thank you!
I heard that a Dutchman was inclined to ask, “May I have my bicycle back, please?” when meeting a German, after the Second World Unpleasantness. Which is quaint, and the kind of understated humour that could qualify the Dutchman as an Honourary Kiwi.
Yeah the Dutch have a subtle way to remind the Germans of the horrible treatment they received in the Second World Unpleasantness. Some of the old and dilapidated bunkers left from that time have been graced with signs reading the equivalent in German to ‘Vacancies’ or ‘To Let”.
Ootz, thanks for drawing my attention to that quote from Hundertwasser,of whom I knew only a little. My father and uncle survived the Unpleasantness in Kamp Amersfoort.
@Ambi after all, what is not to like about the little vacas and their fellows? It must be a fairly universal trait to take prurient delight in homophones for the ribaldries of one’s mother tongue. Prurient it may be but also oddly innocent and mostly harmless. My personal hierarchy is absurdity, ribaldry, good puns and satire a poor last. Satire comes into its own under truly oppressive regimes, but I am fortunate enough to be free.
SNAP Su.
Let’s hope one day someone makes a satire full of absurd, ribald puns.
Thanks Ootz, su, FDB.
Ootz, one of the most moving war memorials I’ve seen stands in a park in Leyden. A small black statue of a young girl, standing and looking downwards with tears rolling down her cheeks. At her feet, the only inscription reads: “1939-1945″. Simple and eloquent.
su, prurience rules! Comedy must rule, whatever the style.