Crossposted on Troppo.
Well, subject to the usual caveats - I take all responsibility for errors of fact, judgement, taste and ideology - I still thank you all for helping me out on this column which has now been published.
Whether you think it’s any good or not, this was the most successful exercise in ‘open-sourcing’ a column I’ve had. It began with some musings a week or so ago cross posted to LP.
Reactions helped me sort out my ideas. I was struck by the strong (and reductionist) dichotomy between nature and nurture. Often this was invoked by feminists for the purposes of sending it up. “Don’t tell me women are genetically programmed for housework.” I agree that that’s a long bow to draw. Still I’d used the word ‘temperament’ in the previous post.
The ground is so contested and adversarial that it’s easy to be misunderstood – in fact it’s almost impossible not to be misunderstood.
You’ll notice that in the piece though I mention neuro-psychology which suggests that boys and girls’ cognitive development are quite different, I don’t really go into the content of it. I tried that and then thought I was getting trapped into ‘Women are more nurturing’ kind of statements. I am pretty suspicious of that kind of stuff, though I expect that’s the kind of thing many will think I’m arguing.
So if you have a look at what I’ve said there are several things I’ve tried to do.
1. Not specify the differences between the sexes specifically – except to say that women often choose some things willingly – as do men.
2. Say that, given that there are strong differences it isn’t surprising that complementary roles emerge (though we shouldn’t get too sure that they’re all that perfectly complementary), and – thought it’s not stated in the column they might change from time to time and even reverse.
3. Specify my three stages approach differentiation – which is
a) Biological makeup influencing orientations
b) Personal developmental choices doing a lot of the solidifying, amplifying and interpreting of how those orientations will develop
c) All this taking place in a cultural context.
The word ‘model’ is quite misleading here with all its mechanistic and deterministic implications. The word ‘discourses’ is a tad fashionable for me, but it’s probably the best word I can think of off the top of my head. The three things (discourses a, b, c) outlined above are powerfully interacting influences. That means that I don’t really think that women are more suited to do the housework biologically, or that under different cultural circumstances it mightn’t be entirely OK for it to be ‘men’s work’.
When I try to think about it in the way I’ve set out (and written up less definitively in the column) the important question to me is “Given the biologico-personal-cultural histories of the players, to what extent are the gender roles oppressive (which is bad) and to what extent are they good because they deepen life experiences of value?”
The idea that women can raise children and that doing this is valued in their culture can be oppressive, but for many it deepens their experience of something that (I feel) is as valuable thing as we can do. Given this view I also want men to be involved, and – accordingly – for their role to be reinforced in the culture.
But I have no hangups whatever about there being ‘equality’ in gender roles. Though equality of workload is a practical and political matter between the couple (which is both understandable and not a bad thing) that seems to me to be something between the couple. Gender roles should certainly be flexible (unoppressive) enough not to be a major obstacle to equality of effort if that’s what someone wants to negotiate in a couple.
So while gender roles should not impose inequality where that is felt as an oppression, I don’t think gender roles should be principally about equality. They should be about the things that men and women do – they should help them do them and value and deepen (and in so doing assist) their achievements.
I guess I reckon gender roles are like clothes. They’re supposed to permit differentiation which enriches us – without commanding it or preventing those couples who wish to dress in Mao suits (figuratively or literally) from doing so. But of course that’s a tall order and there are necessary tradeoffs in this fallen world of ours.
Anyway, the column’s below the fold. Continue reading ‘Gender division of labour in the home - the column’
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